


Reliving

by LaNaturalBreezeOf_Books



Category: Raw (TV)
Genre: Angst, Drama, Fix-It, Irish dialect and idiolect, M/M, Panic Attacks, Second Chances, Swearing, mentions of abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-02
Updated: 2017-07-30
Packaged: 2018-02-23 20:03:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 27,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2553830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LaNaturalBreezeOf_Books/pseuds/LaNaturalBreezeOf_Books
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Irish TV series of RAW. The final ending in Geoff and Pavel's story. Fate can work in strange, beautiful ways. But it can also be cruel. So painfully, unbearably cruel.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Dying and Waking

**Author's Note:**

> After I watched Geoff and Pavel's story I was scraping the internet for Fanfiction of the great couple and let me tell you I wasn't satisfied with the little to nothing that I found, so I wrote one myself.  
> Initially, I posted this on Fanfiction.net and by posting it on here I hope it might reach the small few who are in love with Geoff and Pavel and maybe get some people interested in their story.  
> 
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own the TV show of RAW. I'm using the time line of the episodes (part) 43-45 of Geoff and Pavel if you want to follow along or reacquaint yourselves with the events. I do not own the characters. I'm not writing this for profit, only for my reading pleasure and for everyone else's. If you watched the show you will recognise many a dialogue and scene description. That is because I will be writing parallel to the episodes, hence the title. I do not own those dialogues or scenes or claim them as my original work. The thoughts and other dialogue NOT in the episodes are in fact my original ideas, minus the characters of course. Enjoy reading.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own RAW or the characters. This isn't for profit. This is Fanfiction.   
> The episodes we will be going through will be episodes (part) 43-45 of the Geoff and Pavel Story.   
> Strap in and enjoy the ride.  
> -La

 

It was supposed to be a celebration.

Everyone in the workforce coming together, clinking glasses, being merry and sharing laughs together.

Geoff smiled at everyone around the table. Kate was handing over the delicious smelling bread plate and the freshly baked slices were going fast in a flurry of eager hands.

"Hey, hey! Mind the wine would yer?" Jojo shielded her glass of white from Shane's heavy plate that he was retrieving from Philip.

And then in the infamous Shane-chain reaction everyone gave their voice.

"Bloody hell, watch what you're doing Shane!"

"Yeah watch it, Shane."

"Gosh, mind your arm Shane."

Shane just rolled his eyes at them. _Screw the lot of them._

Fiona swirled her glass of red around. The rich aromatic scent of the wine fitted perfectly with the aura of the room. The whole team gathered around for a very special staff meal. This was an acknowledgement of a rising talent with the name of Philip and a celebration-slash-send off for Geoff and Pavel, wishing them good luck for their restaurant in Prague. Raw was moving forward exceptionally well and Fiona had no doubt that even when the current Head Chef and Front of House Manager were gone the restaurant would still go on strong.

Around the excited table Jojo was subtly making up for her rude behaviour to Philip who was soon to be her second hand. She was giving him little apologetic smiles and Philip, the shy lad just smiled down at his plate.

Kitchen porter, or as Geoff had dubbed _Cinderella,_ Emma, was feeling a lot more comfortable with the staff and clearly felt the team spirit from her time working at Raw. Kate was getting the rest of the wine glasses ready for their cheer. She had paused beside the Chef where Pavel's seat was.

"Geoff, Pavel, is he red or white?"

The Head Chef looked up from a joke he was listening to with Maeve and the kitchen hand, Paul. He answered promptly with a nod. "Ah, he's red." And then realising that Pavel still wasn't at the table he twisted to scan the room. "Where is he though? Pavel!"

Everyone was now digging in, the clanking of knives and forks and moans of delight were the primary sounds now. Even though the familiar hollering of their boss was common place to them the shout of Pavel's name brought out a chant around the table, it was usual for the Czech Manager to be fashionably late.

When he didn't hear any response back Geoff got up from his chair. _How bloody long does it take to get a bottle of alcohol?_ But then a weird feeling made him afraid to go back into the kitchen.

_What if he had second thoughts and ran? He wouldn't do that…he is still there right? Maybe he's nervous about the announcement...we're getting married, and he said yes._

That thought alone was enough to get a contented smile on Geoff's face. Behind him he heard chants of Pavel's name, they would no doubt erupt into cheers when he would eventually make his presence; everyone loves Pavel. _Its fine, he's probably just taking his time._

He turned the corner to the kitchen and a wave of relief washed over him, Pavel _was_ fine. He was sitting on the steps to the office taking a moment. A teasing smile was playing at Geoff's lips at a joke about badly timed Czech breaks but for some reason he never got the words out. Instead, what came out was a hesitant call of Pavel's name, just to get his attention…jolt him out of whatever deep thought processing he was having.

An unsettling feeling formed in his gut when Pavel never looked up from the steps.

Geoff took a step forward, a little confused on why Pavel would start one of his games now. "Pavel." He put a small chuckle in the call to tell him the joke was up, but there was no response. That wasn't like him at all.

Geoff saw the square bottle of Czech alcohol that Pavel was bringing out toppled over on the floor by his feet.

"Pavel?" the unsettling feeling in his gut came back at full force and all thoughts of a joke were wiped from his mind immediately. Something was wrong. Something was really, really wrong.

Geoff kneeled down and put his hands on his fiancé's thigh, his head was down and he was completely still. There wasn't any movement around his chest…but it was hard to judge because his body was in a slumped position. Geoff had to lean his head in to look at Pavel's face. His eyes were open, but it didn't look like they were looking at anything. His beautiful hazel eyes were…vacant.

It didn't…It didn't make any sense. It couldn't be...

_It won't_ Geoff's mind said firmly, _because it isn't._

"Pavel…" Geoff shook him, it was a joke. He was sleeping. It was a joke.

Nothing.

It wasn't a joke.

"…Pavel!" He shook him again, thoroughly this time, hands firm on his arms.

But there was no response. His eyes were open but they were unseeing.

"Pavel, wake up."

He wasn't sleeping.

Geoff felt his control leave him then. "Pavel," his voice broke. "No, no, no…"

Gently he cradled Pavel into his arms and lowered them to the floor. Pavel was limp, his head rolled back from the movement and Geoff was haunted by his absent face. "No…no, Pavel!" Geoff whispered, pain etched into his face. This wasn't happening. _This couldn't be happening._

It was all a horrible, horrible nightmare.

"Pavel?" his voice was keening now, his trembling hand moved erratically in Pavel's hair and the other one pressed against his back. "Pavel, come back to me Pavel…" He then started rocking, clutching the best thing that had ever happened to him to his chest and whimpering out his name through a choked throat.

The tears weren't held back.

The air was suffocating him.

Pavel never came back to him.

And Geoff cried over the body of the most special, most precious man in his world.

He didn't even get to say goodbye.

Anguish was the only feeling that existed.

Geoff looked down at Pavel's face. He didn't even look peaceful. He looked…

It was too painful to think the words. Geoff just squeezed his eyes shut and clutched Pavel closer as if he could bring him back to life from his own internal body temperature. He would give his heart to Pavel. It already belonged to him.

Nothing else existed in this moment.

There was no kitchen, no table of staff in the next room, no hard floor beneath them. There was only the warm body of Pavel cradled tightly in Geoff's rocking one and the heart wrenching anguish that tore Geoff through the inside out. It tore through him like a hot knife, slow and excruciating. And as it did all what Geoff could do was hang his head and let the wet sobs pass through his pulverised state and transmit into the quiet hum of the kitchen.

His rocking slowed, only clutching at Pavel's back. If he was to let go then the nightmare would forever be a reality and there was no way in hell Geoff would allow that to happen. He would continue to keep his eyes firmly shut from the horror of it all and let the broken sobs slip through his trembling lips.

It was then that he heard Jojo's voice. She was approaching the kitchen, probably being sent to see what was holding him up. The sound of her shoes were loud on the hard floor as it approached but it soon went silent.

"Geoff?"

* * *

 

 

_A Moment Before_

 

The chants of Pavel's name quickly died when Geoff went off to find him; it was hard to resist the temptation of Philip's onion beef stew.

"If you don't mind me, Philip, I might just take back a few servings for tomorrow." Fiona winked at him, bringing another spoonful of beef goodness to her mouth. As Philip was already quite red from all the praise he received today the fact that this was the co-partner of Raw, the iron lady of business, was enough to raise another wash of red to his face.

"Tanks, Fiona."

"Aww! Look yer turned him into a plum tomato!" Jojo pointed her fork at Philip with a laugh. Kate was finished with her wine rounds and soon everyone was up and raising their glasses in cheer.

"To Raw" Fiona smiled.

"To Raw!"

"And to Geoff and Pavel's new restaurant in Prague!" She added. Fiona didn't think that the two guys would come back in time to hear but it was always nice to cheer regardless.

"Here-here!" Everyone clanked their glasses of red and white wine together. Once they all sat down again to resume their meals Shane voiced the absence of their temporary boss.

"It's not like Geoff to miss out on an opportunity to be cheered at." He chuckled with one of the lads.

Fiona finished taking a sip from her red wine. "Jojo, can you see what's taking them so long." she nodded at the Sous Chef but Jojo made a face.

"What if I walk in arn them doing…someling?"

Shane made an exasperated sound "Just go, Jojo."

Jojo turned a glare in her brother's direction "Shut up, Shane."

"Yeah, shut up Shane."

"Yeah shaddup, Shane."

"Yeah, shut up Shane!"

Emma giggled at the Shane-chain reaction and Fiona rolled her eyes. "Just see what's taking them so long."

Grumbling, Jojo pushed up from her chair and walked towards the kitchen. As she turned the corner Donny, the new kitchen hand called her attention from the table.

"When you're there can yer get my hue lighter, should be near the fridge!" Everyone knew that Donny had a small obsession with vintage cigarette lighters and it was typical for him to lose them all around the place. Jojo shook her head.

"You forgot the hue…" She chuckled but when she got to the kitchen she stopped dead in her tracks. Her smile dropped like a rock.

Sitting at the bottom of the office steps was Geoff holding Pavel close to his chest. Pavel's head hung limp and Geoff clearly was in major distress; his eyes were pinched shut and lines of grief were evident on his face.

"Geoff?" she whispered and when she heard a broken sob spill from Geoff's normally composed character she rushed forward and knelt beside them. Geoff never opened his eyes.

"Pavel?" Jojo pressed two fingers against the pulse point in Pavel's neck, feeling for a pulse.

Nothing.

Geoff clutched Pavel closer and shook his head at Jojo's efforts. "No, no, no…" his broken sobs felt detached, as if every minute that passed a wave of fresh disbelief made him believe that Pavel wasn't really…but Geoff was too afraid to open his eyes.

"I'm gonna call an ambulance." Jojo scrambled up from the floor and ran out of the kitchen. Geoff dug his face into Pavel's shoulder, letting the tears soak into the dark blue material. This would be the last time he would ever hold his Pavel. Never again would he have this moment again.

This was his goodbye.

Slowly he cracked his eyes open and gazed down mournfully at Pavel's hair. Geoff shifted him up so Pavel's heavy head rested on his shoulder. He tried not to look at his eyes, the de…the _dead_ eyes.

The word brought unbearable pain, he couldn't stand it. He couldn't bear it.

Couldn't bear the _dead_ weight he desperately clutched onto.

Couldn't bear to see those _dead_ eyes that was permanently burnt into his mind.

Couldn't bear the feeling, the reality.

This was not how their story at Raw was meant to end. It was meant to end with a wedding, the most amazing event where Geoff Mitchell would declare his love and commitment to the beautiful, caring, sweet and gold hearted Pavel Rebien aka. _Paulo_.

_Paulo._

What came out of his mouth Geoff didn't know but it sounded like a mix between a choked laugh and a tormented cry. It moved towards the latter as he bent over Pavel's curled body and once again squeezed his eyes shut.

Heavy denial, gut wrenching anguish and the feel of Pavel was the only thing that existed.

This wasn't a nightmare anymore.

Jojo almost fell over as she sprinted around the corner back to the dining room. There was only one thing that she was focussing on and that was the front of house phone.

It was only a short space to run but it felt like her feet weren't moving fast enough.

The sounds of laughter at the table died down, the clanks of knives and forks stopping to a halt. They must have seen her face, pale white with shock.

"Jojo?"

She skidded to a stop by the phone and immediately punched in '999' on the receiver.

_Call_

It was ringing.

"Come arn, come arn…!" She whispered, clutching at her head impatiently. Her vision started to get misty but she stubbornly blinked the tears back; she had to stay in control. She had to be strong.

"Jojo, what's going on?"

" _Hello, this is emergency services, what is your emergency?"_

"My friend, he's…he's not responsive. I can't find a pulse or anyling. His eyes are wide open but he's not…he's not-"

" _Can you state your address?"_

Jojo rattled off the information while at the table the severity of the situation was becoming clear.

"What happened?" Emma automatically looked to her older sister for answers but Fiona was looking in the direction of the kitchen. Shane shot from his chair and jogged over to his stricken sister.

"Where's Geoff?"

"She said someone was hurt, it's not...it's not Pavel is it?" Maeve voiced what everyone was thinking.

"Oh my god, we should see if…" It looked like everyone was going to get up from their seats but it was Fiona that stopped things from getting out of hand.

"Stop. Don't go anywhere." The business woman rose from her chair and walked swiftly to the kitchen. _Please just let it be a small thing. Please don't be as bad as I think it is._

" _There is an ambulance going to your address, the ETA should be 3 minutes. Have you tried to find a pulse by his wrist? Can you see any blood?"_

"Erm…no, only his neck. I'll try it agai- _God_ , Shane!" Jojo quickly spun around, only to jump from bumping right into her brother.

"Jojo, what's going on? Who are yer calling?"

Jojo did not have time to explain the situation right now. "Just come!" She ran past him, phone pressed to her ear with medical advice on the opposite line.

When Fiona rounded the corner she saw a distraught Geoff cradling Pavel to his chest, wet tears streaming down his cheek . Dozens of questions ran through her head, mainly _what happened, how did this happen? What the hell happened? Why isn't Geoff doing anything? Why isn't Pavel moving? God, why...what?_ She couldn't simply ask Geoff because he didn't look like he could do anything right now. _Assess the situation, Fiona._ She looked around the kitchen. It was spotless, no broken windows, no upturned tables, no scattered knives.

Satisfied that there wasn't any third party involvement she kicked off her high heels and knelt beside the two men. She held Pavel's head carefully and lifted it ever so slowly. He definitely wasn't awake, the heaviness of his head was a factor but his eyes weren't closed. Fiona tried to readjust him to take a better look at his eyes but Geoff pulled him in closer with a desperate cry.

"Geoff, I need to look at Pavel." Fiona's steady voice didn't seem to register with the distraught Geoff that was clinging onto Pavel like a lifeline. He didn't open his eyes to look at her, he just quietly let wet sobs wrack his rocking body. This was a side to Geoff that Fiona had never believed she would see, not even outside the kitchen.

"Geoff, I know you're worried about him but Pavel needs medical attention. Let me take a look at him, _please_ Geoff." Fiona pleaded softly. Geoff shook his head vehemently, his hands were white from the tight grip he had on Pavel's clothes. Fiona reached over to take Pavel's wrist, she pressed two fingers against his pulse point.

"Come on Pavel," Fiona muttered "you can't leave us just yet." She moved to his neck, where the strongest pulse point was supposed to be.

"Fiona!" Jojo rushed into the kitchen, Shane hot on her heels. She dropped to her knees beside Fiona and grabbed Pavel's wrist. "Did yer check-"

"I did," Fiona's face was grim "I didn't get anything."

"Is there erny bleeding?" Jojo placed her hand on Pavel's shoulder, trying peer around Geoff but the Head Chef was making the examination quite difficult.

"I'm not sure, we need Geoff to let go of Pavel." Fiona was trying to peer around to check Pavel's nose but Geoff chose that moment to bury his head into his shoulder, another choked sop escaping his lips.

"They said he may have hit his head, head trauma." Jojo relayed to them, she then looked over her shoulder at Shane who stood frozen to the floor a few feet away. "Shane! Get here! Hold Geoff while we move Pavel!"

The two women circled their arms around Pavel and when Shane hovered beside them, hands ready, they slowly pulled Pavel's heavy weight from Geoff's lap, his head cradled gently in Fiona's hands. Geoff tightened his arms, a louder sob spilling from his bowed head.

Shane grunted at the strain of his muscles as he pulled Geoff's arms away from Pavel. When Pavel was almost clear Geoff suddenly lurched forward, the warm body was leaving him. Pavel was slipping away. He couldn't take it.

"No! No, no, no..." someone was pinning his arms back.

He didn't feel strong enough to fight against them.

Geoff sagged in defeat, there was nothing he could do now. Pavel was gone, he was dead.

"His right ear is bleeding. Can yer find any vitals?"

"I...No Fiona." Jojo's voice went quiet.

Fiona didn't say anything. What could she say?

Without warning a devastating wave of despair and disbelief pummelled through Geoff. This one made him tilt his head back and let loose a strangled cry.

He heard the ambulance approaching, the sirens were an urgent drone getting louder and louder.

Shane released his arms and Geoff wrapped them around himself, rocking himself for a slip of self-comfort. Choked sobs bubbled up and out of him in a constant stream of sorrow and stabbing grief.

"No, no, no …"

Jojo moved to sit beside him. She wrapped a skinny arm around his waist and hugged him as Geoff's whole world broke around him.

"I'm so sorry, Geoff."

"No, no, no…"

The sirens were so loud it hurt his ears.

"Geoff, we hafta leave."

The air was getting tight in his chest. He couldn't breathe. The loud sirens were now accompanied by his heart beating erratically in his ear.

"Geoff..." Jojo grasped his face. "Geoff!"

"Geoff!" That wasn't Jojo's voice.

"Wake up, Geoff!"

As if he was jolted by lightning, Geoff found himself in a completely different...reality.

Reality.

He sprung forward, gasping, wide-eyed into darkness.

He was in bed. In his room.

The side lamp switched on and instantly he felt warm hands on either side of his face.

"Geoff"

And there he was.

Concerned hazel orbs of impeccable design scanning his face.

Even his worried frown was a breath of fresh air.

"Are you alright?"

Geoff blinked, he opened his mouth but nothing came out. He lifted a shaking hand and tentatively laid it on Pavel's warm cheek. The alive hazel eyes flickered to his hand and his eyebrows furrowed in further worry.

"You were yelling, a lot." Pavel didn't add that he was also crying loudly into the now soaked pillow. The tears were evident though, fresh and dry tear marks that streaked Geoff's face. He used his thumb to wipe the fresh tears away. "Bad dream?"

Geoff took a deep breath, trying to calm his racing heart. Outside he heard the siren of the ambulance approach again, it passed their window with a quick flash of electric blue.

"That's the second ambulance tonight" Pavel said absently, stroking his thumb over Geoff's cheek bone. "I'm surprised you didn't wake up after the first one." he joked, lips turning up in an effort to lighten up the mood.

Geoff's hand moved around Pavel's cheek to the back of his neck and he slowly pulled their foreheads together, noses almost touching. He took another deep breath and almost broke down again when he felt Pavel's faint breath fan his face.

He really wasn't dead.

"I thought…" he whispered, swallowing down the lump in his throat.

"I know," Pavel stopped him from saying any more "It was just a dream, Geoff. I'm right here, see?" He lifted his face up so he could look directly into his sea green eyes. "I'm not going _anywhere_."

"Yeah." Geoff breathed.

"Yeah?" Pavel smiled. He brushed some dark curls away from Geoff's forehead and kissed firmly above his temple. And then a new voice gave Geoff _another_ shock of his life.

"Geoff, are you feeling better?" Standing at the threshold, holding a glass of water was someone who he thought left a while ago.

"Selena?"

_What the hell was she doing here?_

"I brought you some water." She walked into the room and handed him the cool glass. Geoff accepted it with a mutter of thanks and took a large gulp of the liquid.

"You look terrible." Selena continued. She reached out to stroke her hand through his messy hair. Geoff saw the liquid trembling so he handed the water back.

"So do you." He acknowledged her current state; her hair was tangled and her eyes were smudged, probably from forgetting to take off her makeup before she went to bed.

"Well, can't blame a girl for not looking her best at two in the morning." She grumbled, folding her arms.

_Was that how late it was?_ Geoff rubbed his temple. "Argh…okay. Sorry about that."

"No worries, goodnight Geoff" Selena smiled and then when she was halfway through the door she glanced back. "Goodnight Pavel."

"Nite." Geoff groaned. Pavel didn't bother responding, there was a tightness to his lips. _He really didn't like Selena._ Pavel was about to turn the lights off and burrow beneath the duvet again but a question from Geoff made him pause.

"What is she doing here?"

Pavel frowned and nodded towards the door. "What, Selena?"

"Yeah, I thought she left."

"No, Selena has been here for quite some time now." Pavel looked worried again. "Geoff, are you _sure_ you're alright?"

It was probably nothing.

Geoff shook his head "No, its fine mate." He settled back down but recoiled back up again at the sensation of a damp pillow. His tear soaked pillow.

He quickly chucked the ruined pillow to the end of the bed and used his spare that resided beneath it, laying back down quietly.

"Sweet dreams." Pavel leaned over him, smiling and Geoff brushed his hanging hair to the side.

"Goodnight." His heart eased when Pavel descended on him with a quick kiss right on the lips but there was also this strange feeling in his stomach that stopped him from relaxing. Pavel switched the lamp off and settled down by his side. Geoff automatically curled around him and tried to relax.

* * *

 

#

It was about an hour later, everything was how it should be- quiet, dark and asleep.

Except Geoff couldn't get to sleep.

Something wasn't right.

"Pavel," Geoff whispered. His boyfriend stirred so Geoff shook his shoulder gently. "Pavel." He said a bit louder. This time Pavel groaned into his pillow.

"Mmmwhat, Geoff?"

"Uh…" He didn't know what was wrong. Now he felt a little embarrassed for waking Pavel up in the dead of the night for no apparent reason other than a strange feeling. "N-nothing, sorry. You can go back to sleep."

Pavel turned to look at him, in the dark room Geoff could almost make out his bleary eyes. "And you won't wake me again?"

Geoff gave him a reassuring smile but it was with little effort. If that smile was a dish he would burn it off the face of his kitchen.

And of course, nothing could get past Pavel.

"Something _is_ wrong, isn't it?" He turned fully on his side. "Are you feeling bad about Jojo?"

_Jojo?_

He lifted his head from his pillow "What happened to Jojo?"

Pavel looked at him like he was going crazy. "You...you fired her."

"When!?" Geoff exclaimed. Why would he fire his Sous Chef?

"Yesterday."

_Yesterday?_

Taking in his expression Pavel felt the need to explain further. "She was being aggressive to Philip and wasn't performing up to standard. You said she brought it on herself…Geoff, what is it?"

The wheels were turning in his head, little bits were clicking into place. "What's the date?"

"It's the eleventh. Yesterday was the tenth."

Geoff felt everything tilt horribly. The sickening realisation hit him when it all fell into place.

_Holy shit._

"What's the matter?" Pavel really didn't know what was going on.

"Do I have the catering job at the gallery today?" his voice sounded strained.

"Yes, the client wanted the menu twelve but without the-"

"-almond pancetta."

"Yeah-"

"And they changed the desert servings from six to eight."

"Exactly."

_Shit, shit, shit…_

"See, you have nothing to worry about." Pavel yawned, obliviously slowly falling back to sleep with no idea of the horrified turmoil Geoff was experiencing.

"Did Fiona call tonight? Mentioning something about a hospital?"

"No, nothing." Pavel frowned slightly, now half asleep. "Why?"

_She might call later today._

"No reason." He croaked.

She would call. There was a 99% chance that she would. Geoff had very little doubt in that.

"Mmm" Pavel grunted, turning around to get more comfortable and effectively ending the conversation. In no time Pavel was fast asleep and Geoff was left lying on his back, staring at the ceiling with no hope in hell of going to sleep. There was no way he could get his forty winks now. Sleep was the last thing on his mind.

 

Because this was the day. This was the _fucking day._

 

_Holy fucking shit._

 

* * *

 

To be continued.


	2. Adjusting

7:00 AM. The Next Day

 

In the silence of the empty restaurant, what was usually quiet- the low hum of the coffee machine- was now the loudest thing in the dining room. However it created a delightful, soothing vibration that was absolutely _heaven_ to the Head Chef.

The Head Chef whose head rested on the smooth flat surface, passed out in exhaustion.

_Vrring!_

The shrill ring shocked him awake and he lurched up, disorientated and looked down. His coffee was done.

Geoff took his filled expresso cup and took a small sip of the hot drink. _Ah…_ On reaction his mind supplied him with fantasy images of a coffee sun bursting in his mouth, rich brown bean grounds spinning into sunshine, raining droplets of bliss onto his tongue.

 _Mmm…coffee_ he sighed, slowly treading back into the kitchen.

Even though it was a perfect time to start the prep for the gallery function Geoff really wasn’t in the mood for chopping onions. Instead, he gravitated towards the eggs and flour pantry. He had time to make a quick pancake.

While Geoff’s body switched to autopilot his mind wandered. It was strange, to be in the same cycle of events as-what felt like but actually wasn’t-yesterday. He couldn’t help but remember flashes of the day, _this_ day. Though he may not be the bearer of perfect memory there were still things that he remembered clearly, events still stuck in his head.  

Before he could stop himself he glanced up to the dark office, he hadn’t been in there since he opened up, and in an instant reaction panic began to squeeze at his heart. _It’s just fucking steps, Geoff_ his mind attempted to be the voice of reason, which frankly was a bloody pathetic failure because it was his same mind that was providing him with those _dead_ eyes, the limp body and the crushing grief that destroyed his heart, all in one staggering swipe. That all happened right there.

And now he was frying a pancake about a metre away from it.

Geoff tore his eyes away and looked down at the sizzling pan, the pancake should be flipped in a momen-

His hand was shaking. Just like when he had needed to take those anti-anxiety pills that Doctor _Tosser_ had ‘prescribed’ him.

Geoff could really do with a couple of them right now.

He let go of the spatula and ran his shaking hand over his face, squeezing his eyes shut. How the _bloody hell_ was he going to get through this day?

A waft of burning pancake mix tickled his nose and, swearing, Geoff turned the fire down and quickly flipped it. The side facing upwards were different colours of brown and black, looking very grim.

Well, let’s hope that he won’t burn the kitchen down before the day was over.

_If Pavel saw that he wouldn’t let me cook breakfast for him for a whole week. No chance at dinner either._

At that thought his lips quirked up in a small smile. Thinking of Pavel always made him feel a little better, especially now that it overtook all of the disturbing images plaguing his mind and replaced them with the ones that didn’t include anything from his…nightmare. Wherever there was a darkness Pavel could always be trusted to bring forth his ray of sunshine and lift everyone back on their feet again. _Good ol’ Pavel._

In the morning he found himself looking back at the bed twice, just to reassure himself that the lump beneath the covers with the messy mop of hair peeking out _was_ indeed Pavel. After that horrible experience, he would call it that because he didn’t believe that it was a simple nightmare, Geoff was starting to realise the fragility of his world around him. Anybody could be ripped away from life without a second warning. It gave him a greater appreciation for everything in his life and with Pavel Geoff didn’t want to waste any moment he had with him.

He wanted to give him a proper morning greeting that couples do to each other. He wanted to cook him his favourite meal, go out and watch the most ridiculously cheesy movie he could find. Recite him in absurdly sappy detail how much he loves him and then spend the rest of the night making love with all the passion and adoration his heart could muster.

God, he missed him already.

“Ello?” A faint voice called from around back.

Geoff looked at the clock on the wall: 7:19.

 _Shit, the supplies._ He quickly transferred the half burnt pancake to the cooling rack and dusted his hands on his red Chef apron.

He got round back and saw Ed there, waiting patiently in the alley way with the vegetables. Ed had become a very valued supplier to them over the years. His family farm he took over grew the best crops in this part of Ireland and it was a handy stroke of luck that he and Fiona shared a history together.

Geoff wasn’t surprised to find that the once very expensive supplier was now giving them special mates-rates but of course Geoff wasn’t complaining; it was good for business. It was just the fact that he wasn’t overly keen of the risk of the two having a spat and in result the restaurant taking a hard blow by losing their top quality veg supplier. _But if it does, it does, right?_ He remembered saying.

“Ed” He announced as he stepped outside, wiping his hands on his black apron.

“Geoff” The cheerful farmer nodded in a simple greeting. “Now,” Ed presented his green harvest proudly. “Rhubarb, kale, broccoli, leeks-”

“Uh, mate have you spoken to Fiona this morning?”

Thinking this was subtly aimed at their impromptu date two days ago Ed gave a nervous laugh. “No.” He flipped open his clientele book, hoping that Geoff would take the veg and go on his way because he really did _not_ want to get grilled on b-

“Right, well she’s in the hospital.”

She’s _what?_

The colour promptly drained from his face. “What?” He looked intensely at Geoff and the Head Chef quickly reiterated, smiling in apology.

“Not her, she’s fine. It’s…it’s her dad.”

 

#

 

7:43 AM

 

Geoff was halfway through thinly slicing a few onions for prep when he had his second visitor of the day.

“Selena! What are you doing here so early?”

She pulled her dark hair back into a ponytail and gave him a delighted grin. “I knew you would come into work without breakfast so I decided to come down and treat you to a fry up!”

 _Mmm, a fry up._ Selena knew his weaknesses.

“Sweet, well don’t let me get in your way.” Geoff grinned, going back to the onions. But before he started again he paused; flashes of Pavel’s face came to the forefront of his mind. The annoyance obvious in his body posture as he scraped the oatmeal into the bin, the sharp clang of the lid closing, his own voice saying a pathetic excuse of an apology. Then a flash of Selena’s face, showing that weird look she was sporting at Pavel, like she had won something.

Geoff didn’t know what it meant back then but he had a pretty good idea now.

Weaknesses be damned.

“Actually, Selena, Pavel should be coming soon and he might be…bringing something.”

He spoke clearly but it was like the words had fallen on deaf ears. Selena was busy fishing out a frying pan and promptly placed it on a heat then made her way to the large fridge, all the while humming a tune.

Geoff put down the knife.

“Selena.”

She finally turned to face him. Geoff could tell that she was annoyed- her smile looked a little bit too tight. “You don’t know if he will.”

“Ah, so you _did_ hear me.” he muttered under his breath. Well, in any normal situation she _could_ be right but in _this_ situation Geoff was 99% sure that his amazing and wonderful boyfriend would be walking into the kitchen with a brown paper bag of the _opposite_ of a fried breakfast- the health nut -in about fifteen minutes. Pavel was bringing him breakfast and Geoff would be sure to eat it, fruits and all.

Fry up be damned.    

“There’s a pretty good chance that he will.” He shrugged simply.

“I can’t see him anywhere.” She put her hands on her hips and gave Geoff a knowing look who gave her a serious one back. “Oh come on Geoff!” she laughed “You’ve never said no to a fry up before.”

“Yeah well I’m saying it now.” The abruptness of his words with the sharp tone took Selena off guard for a second. Before she could come up with a response to it he continued, “Look, he’ll be here in fifteen minutes, tops. All I’m saying is there’s no point in wasting supplies. _And_ , I would hate to waste Pavel’s money just because I couldn’t resist a stupid fry up.”

Selena went quiet. She turned around and switched the fire off with a forceful flick of her wrist then yanked the pan off the cooker, all under the watchful eye of Geoff. He knew his friend long enough to know that Selena wasn’t the type of person who would easily blow her top, unlike him. She would always let it simmer under a façade of sweet words and false smiles. Her expression of anger was a more passive aggressive type.

And a clear example of that was right at this moment. Geoff knew it wasn’t just because he refused a fry up for Pavel’s sake but because Selena didn’t like Pavel, and Pavel obviously didn’t like Selena either. The quiet hostility between the two didn’t go unnoticed to Geoff and he was willing to bet it didn’t go unnoticed to the other minions at Raw either.  

Geoff could see why Pavel was itching for her to leave and he understood it, he really did. Honestly, it was exhausting trying to tip-toe around his old friend and hope that she didn’t run her mouth off to everyone about things that Geoff would rather like to stay between them. He would _hate_ himself if Pavel got hurt because something was said and he took it the wrong way. The only way to avoid that was to stay on Selena’s good side, or somehow get the upper han-

_Wait a fucking minute!_

Geoff had almost forgotten! How could he forget about the restaurant! Selena’s previous job in London that she had ran from to here. The restaurant in London that Selena had stolen _five thousand_ pounds from. The _real_ reason why she was here and unwilling to leave.    

A sly smile slowly started to pull at Geoff’s lips; Upper hand it is then.

But then slowly remembering something his smile faltered. He still had to get the evidence about her theft, which Geoff had no clue where Selena had hidden it, and then contact the restaurant, which was mainly Pavel’s doing. _Pavel_ , he thought tenderly, his talented Czech detective.

Before his thoughts could go to the gutter Selena turned around once more and this time the sweet smile was back.

“I’m gonna make a coffee, you fancy one?”

“I could _murder one,_ thanks Selena.”

When she walked out of the kitchen Geoff picked up the knife again.

“Alright onions, let’s finish this.”

 #

 15 minutes later

 

Geoff was finished with the onions and had moved onto the crayfish. He prepared the pan for a flash fry, turning the fire to the highest setting. He reached over to the side and picked up his coffee cup, taking a sip. His eyes strayed to the clock, Pavel should be here by now.

Down the hall he heard someone approaching.

He turned so quickly that some of the coffee splashed over the rim of the shallow mug and trickled down his chin and hand.

And it wasn’t even Pavel.

Selena looked all too amused. “Careful with that Geoff, you wouldn’t want to burn yourself.” She rolled her pink sleeves up to her elbow and perched herself on the large prep table. The one Malcom, the crazy bastard, used to torture the minions with a hundred or so shallots with. “Pavel still not here then?”

Geoff shook his head as he placed the shallow mug down, wiping his hand on his apron. “It’s not even hot.” He then nodded at the small packet in her hand. “What is that and why is it in my kitchen?”

She rolled her eyes “I popped out to buy some sweets from that shop down the road. You want one? They’re like a chewy marzipan-”

“Ah, no thanks.” He made a face and turned back to prying the shells off of the crayfish. “Just don’t leave it lying ‘round my kitchen.”

He didn’t see her face but he could hear the eye-rolling all the way from where he was standing. The sweet packet made a loud crackling sound as she closed it back up again. “Shall I get you another then?” Geoff had to glance back to see that she was pointing at his cold coffee.

“If you wouldn’t mind, Selena.”

He was already fantasising about another one.

Selena left again to get him a fresh cup and Geoff threw the crayfish into the prepared pan. Instantly a loud sizzle erupted into a high flame from the pan and in four seconds it quickly settled back down again. He turned the heat down and chucked in a small handful of the sliced onions to sauté them, shaking the pan around the fire.

 

#

 

It had just gone ten past eight when he finally arrived. To Pavel, it was another normal day; nothing much had happened the day before and there was nothing to be excited about today, as far as he knew. So you see, it came as a surprise to him when he turned the corner and Geoff’s whole being seemed to light up like the sun when he saw him. It was like Father Christmas had arrived.

“Pavel!” Geoff quickly wiped his hands on his apron and when he got to his bemused boyfriend he spread his arms out and enveloped him in a tight bear hug. He smelt like fresh leaves.

“Hi” Pavel chuckled, a little bewildered at Geoff’s abnormal behaviour, “What are you so excited about?” his voice was slightly muffled by Geoff’s shirt.

Geoff pulled back a bit to look at his face, he knew he must have been smiling stupidly but Geoff couldn’t give a shit about that; he had taken enough things for granted already. “At seeing you, of course!” He squeezed his shoulders. “How are you, you alright? I thought you were coming in at eight?”

Pavel nodded, an eyebrow slightly pinched at the abnormal enthusiasm Geoff didn’t normally exert in the morning “Yes, I’m fine. A bit tired, since _someone_ woke me up in the middle of the night. Twice.” He turned accusatory eyes to a guilty looking Geoff.

 _Shit, so that was why he came in later than normal, my fucking fault._ “Shit-I didn’t-I’m sorry about that, Pavel. It wasn’t-”

“Geoff,” Pavel interrupted him, mouth stretching into a smirk “I’m joking.” His hazel eyes danced at his usual straight-worded humour. This time Geoff didn’t roll his eyes and complain about how he didn’t understand Pavel’s humour but instead, with his hands moving to Pavel’s neck, he leant in and kissed him.

It was only a tender kiss, lips light and gentle upon another, and Geoff relished in the warm of Pavel’s mouth. He tasted minty from toothpaste and he slid his tongue in to play and threaded his hands through Pavel’s soft hair. Pavel whined softly into his mouth as he fisted his hands into Geoff’s black sleeves and deepened the kiss until they broke for air.

Pavel’s hand trailed up to rest at the back of Geoff’s neck while they got their breathing under control. Geoff snaked his hands through Pavel’s black coat so he could grasp his waist and bumping their foreheads together he then leant into the space between them to capture Pavel’s lips again, but he only got in a peck because Pavel tilted his head back with a grunt, obviously wanting to say something.

But Geoff wasn’t interested in talking. He turned to the vulnerable exposed skin under Pavel’s chin. Luckily, he had shaved so stubble burns were kept to a bare minimum. He felt the vibrations under his tongue when Pavel hummed and when his hand _may_ have innocently fell into the dip of Pavel’s wonderful jeans it was pulled back out again, much to the _…_ ~~annoyance~~ gratitudeof Geoff.

“Geoff, we’re at work!” Pavel laughed and Geoff felt the vibrations of his laugh against his tongue which spurred him on further, licking a trail up Pavel’s throat to his chin. Pavel squirmed away from his boyfriend’s hot tongue. The unexpected affection may be nice but there were standards and rules of conduct and Pavel _did_ like his job,whether or not he was sleeping with the boss.

“Fiona said we’re not opening today.” Geoff murmured, moving forward to kiss him again but Pavel jerked his head back once more. The mention of Fiona reminded him of her dad’s sudden admittance to hospital last night and the mood was promptly killed.

“Oh! How is Dan?”

Geoff stopped his advances, though he rested his hands on Pavel’s hips. “Fiona rang about an hour ago, they still haven’t heard anything.”

“I see.” Pavel nodded, but his teeth were worrying his bottom lip.

“He’ll be fine, don’t worry.” Geoff smiled “He’s a pretty tough bloke.”

_“How’s Pavel?” Philip asked Geoff as he came through the swinging doors._

_Geoff was still shaken up from seeing Pavel around the mess of broken glasses. He had thought the worst had happened…when Fiona had called him…it didn’t matter anymore. He was fine. Fronting out a small smile for the kids he pretended everything was fine. “He’s a pretty tough bloke.”_

_He’s a pretty tough bloke._

“Geoff?” Pavel’s voice brought him back to the present.

“Huh?” Geoff blinked and saw Pavel’s curious eyes probing him. “Sorry, I was just thinking about…something.”

Desperate to change the subject he stepped back and nodded to the brown paper bag Pavel was holding. “What’s in the bag?”

Turning his attention to what he had brought along Pavel reached in and took out a filled container of what Geoff already knew was- “Oatmeal, and some fruit. You left so early so-”

“Here’s your co-!”

“You know what Pavel?” Geoff smiled, talking loudly over Selena’s interruption. Pavel looked back at him, a little flustered from the sudden loud voices. “I knew you were going to bring breakfast for me.” He took the warm container from Pavel’s hands with a gracious smile and smirked over at Selena who was walking towards them with his fresh coffee. “How did I know that Selena? How did I know?” Even though it was technically cheating Geoff couldn’t resist boasting-slash-rubbing it in her face.

Selena didn’t smile, she didn’t even speak. Whatever she was thinking was voiced internally as she neatly placed his coffee on the table.

“Thank you Selena.” Geoff felt incredibly smug at changing this course of events. It was a much more satisfying feeling to see Pavel looking rather pleased and Selena taking a back seat for once than the original turn of events that had left Pavel disgruntled and Geoff feeling guilty.

“No problem.” Selena smiled tightly and quickly turned, her head down.

Slowly, Geoff gave Pavel a knowing smile and Pavel cocked his head, chuckling. “What?”

Geoff bowed his head and chuckled, holding the oatmeal container up. “I have to be honest, I _was_ craving a fry-up. _But!”_ He held a finger up, seeing the early stages of a frown and stopping whatever remark Pavel was going to make “I’m starving so…I am going to eat everything in this box.” He tapped the plastic lid and raised a brow, challenging Pavel to call his bluff.

He never did.

Instead, he nodded slowly, trying to look impressed at Geoff’s confidence. “Well done.” he said, trying not to laugh. At the same time the backdoor to the kitchen swung shut, announcing someone’s arrival. Pavel looked over Geoff’s shoulder and raised a hand in a swift wave. “Morning.”

“Morning Pavel.” The familiar gravelly voice of Shane made Geoff turn around.

“Hey!”

“Hey” Shane grumbled, trudging into the kitchen. He obviously didn’t get his forty winks last night. Passing the pan of crayfish Geoff was cooking earlier Shane inhaled the wonderful aroma. Right now he would do anything for something hot and greasy. “I could be doing with one of those.”

“Uh, Shane you do know we’re not opening today?” Geoff perched himself on the counter to keep an eye on the crayfish and cracked open the lid to his oatmeal. Pavel turned to the direction of the office and walked around Selena who was giving him a dirty look, her narrowed eyes visible over the rim of her coffee mug. He went up the steps and entered Geoff’s office, shrugging off his black coat on the way in.

“Yeah, Fiona said. Are you gonna go home?” Shane stopped near Selena. Geoff glanced back at him, which was the same moment that Pavel came through the office doors, flicking through a thick folder.

“No, I…”

 _“Should we…do you want to tell them?” Geoff’s hand played at the collar of Pavel’s shirt. He felt scared shitless at the prospect of giving a big speech in front of everyone_ _be_ _cause bloody hell, they were getting married. He had just proposed to Pavel, although in the most unromantic way possible, he still proposed and he said yes and holy shit he still couldn’t believe it._

_Apart from the whole speech giving and sappy hugging they were going to be doing in a minute with everyone Geoff had never felt so sure of something in his life. Everything felt so surreal. There was nothing that could dampen his mood now._

_“Wait wait! I want to get that bottle I brought you back.” Pavel grasped his hand as he remembered the special drink he had waited to open. This was definitely an opportune moment. “We can open it, when we tell them.”_

_Geoff smiled, letting him go. “It’s in the office.”_

_Watching Pavel enter the office was the last time Geoff saw him alive. That was their last conversation. Geoff would walk out of those doors and he would never see Pavel’s beautiful eyes again. He would never hear his thick, accented voice again._

“Geoff?” Shane was beginning to walk towards the Chef now. He had just stopped in the middle of saying something and was staring blankly into space. Slowly coming back to himself and hearing Shane’s voice Geoff thrust his hand out to stop the man from coming any further.

“I’m fine!” he grinned and hoped it didn’t look too forced, “I’m fine. Just a bit tired, that’s all. I’ve got to get ready for this catering thing at the gallery, there’s plenty more to do.” He rambled, tearing his eyes away from Pavel walking down the office steps, still reading the information in the folder.

“Okay well I can help with that.” Shane offered, ever the generous bloke. Before Geoff could thank him Selena jumped in, the packet of her chewy marzipan sweets crunching in her hand. Ever the contributor.

“Yeah we all can, right Pavel?” She spun around, looking for him.

Pavel looked up from the folder. First his gaze landed on Selena but after seeing her patronising smile he looked at Geoff instead. It was as if their volunteered contribution needed approval by him which was a bit…odd. But Geoff was looking at him like it all _did_ rest on his final decision and so Pavel’s face softened.

“Of course.” He smiled.

And even though Geoff already knew what Pavel was going to say he still felt a relief from hearing the words again. However, he felt a strange dissatisfaction from the smug look Selena was sporting so he pointed his oatmeal-smeared spoon in Shane’s direction.

“Oh yeah and Shane, if you’re hungry I’m sure Selena can knock you up a fry-up. She’s been dying to make one since this morning.” Immediately Selena shot him a look and Geoff gave her an innocent smile before going back to eat his oatmeal.

“Oh, if you could Selena that’d be great.” Shane sighed in gratitude, walking backwards down the hall to the changing rooms to leave his stuff. With the promise of something hot and greasy the day already started to brighten up.

“No problem, I’ll err…get started on it now.” Selena moved past Pavel to prepare for the impromptu requested fried breakfast and on her passing Pavel frowned at her change of mood. One minute she was smug and the next it was like something had gotten under her nail. If he was to be honest to himself he preferred the latter, always.

Closing the folder with a sharp snap he walked off to the dining room to check the bookings, leaving a seemingly pissed Selena and an immensely smug Geoff behind in the kitchen.

 


	3. It Gets a Bit Harder

8:20 AM

 

"Uh, Shane when you're done there I need you to pick up a box of uh, a wine from Harcourt Street, please." Geoff was slicing naan bread for the first courses, giving his commis chef crayfish duty.

"Okay." Shane looked up and nodded quickly, he looked like he was going to say something but when Geoff went back to slicing the bread he hesitated for a moment, debating whether or not he was going to say what was on his mind all morning. He took a handful of sliced crayfish and put them in the pan. _Better now than never_ he relented, so he went for it "I'm sure Jojo feels terrible about yesterday."

 _Ah Jojo._ Geoff knew just how bad she felt, but looking back on the situation he _did_ agree with what he said to justify his decisions. If it wasn't for Jojo telling him exactly what was on her mind, which happened later on _today_ , he wouldn't be thinking as he was now so there was no point trying to be the enlightened man when he really had no incentive to be. He decided it was safer to use the original conversation in these absurd déjà vu circumstances, plus Shane's eyes were burning in the side of his head and he reckons his silence went on for a tad longer than normal. He quickly feigned indifference.

"I didn't get that impression mate."

Shane supposed he should've seen that response coming. He understood a little of where Geoff was coming from, trying to run a stressful business and then finding that he couldn't rely on his second hand, his _Sous chef_ for the simplest things anymore. And then Jojo, being typically Jojo, couldn't admit into telling her boss what was really going on. Geoff and Jojo were both stubborn mules. "You know what she's like, she finds it hard to…"

Geoff looked up "To take responsibility?" Sarcasm dripped from his voice.

Shane looked at his boss in exasperation and jerked his head to say _come on man_ "She screwed up. Jojo loves this place." At the utmost least Geoff could let go of this Arsehole-boss role for a breath of a moment and sympathise with _human_ mistakes made from _human_ emotions. This had nothing to do with work now, Jojo and Geoff were genuine _friends_.

"Like I said mate, I really didn't get that impression."

Shane couldn't believe this jerk. He nodded in resignation as he wiped his hands on a small towel. "I'll go get that wine." He glared at Geoff, the guy didn't even look up from the prepping table.

"If you wouldn't mind." Geoff said, a bit quieter, but before he was finished Shane was storming down the corridor. When he was safely gone Geoff sighed. He put the knife down and rubbed his head wearily, feeling the beginning of a headache.

_Oh, what am I gonna do with you, Jojo?_

* * *

 

 

9:00 AM  
  


Geoff was bringing in a crate of vegetables into the kitchen to prep when he saw Pavel coming down from the office, swiping up the finished container of oatmeal and putting it back in the brown paper bag.

"Thanks for the breakfast." Geoff called, letting a soft smile stretch across his face as he placed the crate down. When Pavel looked over at him he started towards him, a teasing smile playing at his lips. Geoff continued, "It wasn't exactly the fry-up of my dreams but I really did appreciate it." And to show a small percent of his appreciation Geoff kissed him chastely on the lips, once again surprising the Czech Front of House manager; it was rare that Geoff would ever show this much affection at work but Pavel welcomed it. It was a nice change.

Pavel looked thoughtful at his words. He raised his eyebrows with a smirk and pointed at him with the metal spoon in his hand.

"You...you remind me of my-"

"Grandmother?" Geoff smirked, he couldn't help himself.

Pavel stopped in a second of confusion. He gave Geoff a weird look, _how did he…?_ "No…" He tapped the spoon on his chest. "My _grandfather_."

_Wha?_

Geoff's brain short-circuited. His eyebrows drew together in confusion. Pavel was meant to say he reminded him of his grandmother. Not…

It felt weird, shit, it _still_ felt weird being compared to Pavel's elderly relative, his grandfather; what on Earth could his grandfather have in common with him? He wanted to shudder just at the thought of it but, guiltily, there was a niggling part of his brain that had to know. _I would love to carry on without asking…but I just can't._

"What?" he heard himself blurting out.

It was Pavel's turn to smirk. "My grandmother has eaten a fried breakfast, _every day_ , for the last 70 years and my grandfather would always sit beside her and eat a bowl of oatmeal because he said he appreciated whatever came to him. But whenever my grandmother was away he would demand to be cooked a fried breakfast to whoever had the hands to. He eventually agreed with my grandmother, she would say-" and Pavel stressed the next words by tapping the spoon against Geoff's chest "'live each day as if it was your last'."

Geoff couldn't even begin to express the weight those words had coming from Pavel's mouth.

Inconspicuously swallowing down a lump and trying not to let the ineffectively repressed memories cloud his mind Geoff tried to keep the conversation as the original.

"Hmm, bit of a hedonist, your old gran?" he smiled lightly through the pang at his heart. Pavel looked down, folding the paper bag around the empty container.

"Geoff?" he looked up, a face of steely determination "Can we pretend Selena didn't let it slip about the restaurant in Prague?"

Geoff paused.

He knew what Pavel was waiting to hear. The _"Okay"_ a simple word to put it all behind them, to forget about the sensitive subject that was brought up so bluntly, no thanks to Selena, and put a strain on their relationship that neither of them were comfortable with. So yes, Geoff would've said 'okay' just to forget about Selena's meddling and calm the uneasy waters with Pavel. But in doing so would undermine Pavel's dream, his vision he had brought back with him from Prague and there was no way in hell Geoff would think about undermining anything of Pavel's.

 _That_ wasn't okay.

So instead he said-

"You know what," he started, hands moving to Pavel's shoulders. Pavel kept his even gaze, though a small crease of an eyebrow told Geoff he was just expecting a simple 'okay'. But Geoff wasn't going to give him any old 'okay'.

"I think it's a wonderful idea Pavel."

And Pavel wasn't expecting _that._ For a moment he just digested Geoff's words, thinking of something to say but his mind drew blanks. _He just said the restaurant in Prague is a wonderful idea. He just said the restaurant in Prague is a wonderful idea. He just said the restaurant in Prague is a wonderful idea...!_ As he wracked his brain Geoff just waited patiently, his ocean green eyes boring into his warmly. Just with that look was enough to cause Pavel another mind blank and the words he was going to say as he opened his mouth became a rush of exhaled air instead.

"Oh"

The corners of Geoff's eyes creased as he laughed. "Oh?" he repeated "All you have to say is _oh?_ " his eyes danced in his teasing. Pavel seemed to wake his brain up after being shook a little by his shoulders.

"Yes! I mean no. No…" Pavel shook his head, laughing at his inability to speak properly "I meant, I thought you didn't like the idea?"

 _Oh shit_ Geoff thought, mind racing, _I wasn't supposed to be fully on board with the Prague thing was I? At this time I hadn't even read the proposal…ah horsefuckingshit...fuck it._

"Um…" Geoff decided on just shrugging. "I have to admit at first I was surprised, bu-"

"Surprised?" Pavel repeated with raised eyebrows "I fully remember you saying _no way_ it would happen and you would never walk out on RAW and Fiona-"

"Yes well, I did say that didn't I?" Geoff mused, biting back a smile. That conversation felt like it took place eons ago when really it happened only yesterday. He sighed, raising a hand from Pavel's shoulder "Look, Pavel what I said before…I had a long time thinking about it."

"You had a long time thinking about it." Pavel repeated, nodding slowly.

"Yeah and…well…because I was pretty much acting like an arsehole about the whole thing."

Pavel frowned "I wasn't being a complete angel either."

Geoff's lips twitched at that. He internally debated saying that there was nothing Pavel could do which would change his mind on the matter that everything he did was angelic, but he kept that certain thought to himself.

The shy but plainspoken naïve Czechoslovakian waiter he had met those years ago had matured into this stunning, confident man, now the Front of House manager. Though despite his soft lines which have now sharpened and the skin around his jaw being a shade darker from freshly shaved stubble he was still the naïve lovable man Geoff had unknowingly fallen in love with.

And after finishing his little observation Geoff remembered he was in the middle of explaining his sudden change of heart to a waiting Pavel. Blinking slowly, unconsciously bathing in his glow and feeling his heart warm and tongue relax, Geoff just let the words go.

"Pavel," he moved his hand up from Pavel's shoulder and laid it gently by his neck "I realised, that as much as I love RAW it doesn't hold a candle to the love I have for you, and I realised…" Geoff inhaled, remembering to breathe. These words were long overdue and it was about time he pulled his head out of his arse and remembered that he wasn't the only one with dreams. It had to take Pavel dying for him to realise this.

"…I realised that if is this so bloody important to you then its bloody well important to me too." he smirked, using humour to mask the break in his wavering voice. "And this restaurant in Prague is your dream and maybe this opportunity won't come round again so…"

Pavel raised his hands, hearing enough to know what Geoff was getting at. It was the same gesture he made those years ago when he was about to leave for Brazil with Doctor _Tosser_ and Geoff poured his heart out to him in his usual word-stumbling way. Geoff could express himself easily with insults and sarcasm but whenever his heart took the reins he lost all comprehension of a simple sentence structure and careened off course until he started digressing.

So he was glad when his ever-understanding boyfriend took over the reins.

"We don't have to make any decisions now. I left the proposal on your desk if you want to look through it." Pavel said, moving a lock of dark blonde hair away from his eyes and Geoff, not trusting his voice, just nodded. His thumb stroked Pavel's warm neck and he slowly let his head fall down to rest upon his boyfriend's soft bed of hair, closing his eyes.

He felt Pavel's hand slip into his and then heard him murmur softly into their closed space. "I love you too." Fraying locks of hair tickled Geoff's nose and his face twitched at the annoying strands of hair.

At that moment the back doors to the alley swung open and Selena walked through, her back unnaturally hunched, towards the dining area doors. She looked at the pair over her shoulder and felt a bit miffed that they didn't even spare her a single glance. After giving Pavel's back a dirty look she pushed the doors open and disappeared into the next room.

From hearing the door close behind her Geoff raised his head with a sniff, suddenly craving his favourite hot drink. "Mmm, I'm gonna get another coffee." He announced, detangling their hands. He slowly started to walk back towards the door that Selena just went through and Pavel just gave him a knowing smirk as he backed away. Geoff held Pavel's gaze as he backed away but as he had no rear view mirror to see where he was going he walked straight into the sharp-edged metal station.

"Fuck!" He wheezed through a wince and Pavel snorted, watching him amusedly. Feeling less confident in himself now Geoff hesitantly changed direction and as he did Pavel stopped watching the Geoff Mitchell Show and headed off down the hall towards the offices.

"You and your coffees, Geoff!" He called over his shoulder. Geoff paused just as his back hit the swinging doors; there was no way he would let Pavel get in the last word.

"Your grandmother would approve!" He yelled back, waited, and then smiled when he heard Pavel's responding laughter echo down the hall.

  
#

  
No thanks to Selena's bad mood the atmosphere at the bar was tense. When it was only Geoff there early in the morning it was peaceful, only the sounds of quiet whirring from his friend the coffee machine. Now the trance-like drone was ruined by the ear grating clanking of wine bottles as Selena crammed a dozen of them into a cooling bag. The wines were the specially ordered crate that Geoff told Shane to pick up but the way Selena was handling them he was afraid he might have to put in a second order. Geoff had to hold in a wince at a particularly loud clang.

"Ah! Careful with the wine alright? That shit's expensive." He pleaded, eyeing the blue and white cooling bag Selena was rough handling.

Selena gave up wrestling with the bag for a moment and turned her attention to Geoff. She didn't start up anything so half-ignoring her Geoff searched for a mug from the rack.

And then he heard her voice "I really like Pavel." For some reason she was smiling now, probably trying to make Geoff believe that she was on good terms with his boyfriend and Geoff fought back the urge to roll his eyes. _Yes, so the obvious hostility between you and Pavel is just my naturally deranged and disturbed imagination._

"Yeah?" he played along, feeling the familiar sensation of déjà vu as he repeated the already-spoken lines. He gave a little sarcastic laugh, _wow look at that, we both like Pavel. What do ya know, we're so similar. I guess that means we're perfect for each other!_ "So do I" he quipped, a smile pulling at his lips. And so, rather much preferring the sound of hot running coffee to Selena's false cheer, he quickly found the appropriate mug and placed it beneath the nozzle, punching in the button for his drink.

But Selena wasn't done there.

"Look, I'm sure he was gonna talk to you about his restaurant plan." And now for some reason she was taking Pavel's side in an argument that- _oh wait_ -had _nothing_ to do with her. _But wait a fucking minute, wasn't she the one who had let the cat loose on the whole Prague thing?_

Geoff moved his attention from the more-interesting coffee machine to Selena's imitation of sympathy, his gaze hardened as he levelled it at her. It was the certain look that every kitchen staff knew as _Continue with caution._

"I feel really bad mentioning it first." She continued, sympathy had now changed into guilt. Her dark eyes wide for sincerity points.

Geoff just wanted this conversation to end already. He shook his head "It's fine, don't worry about it." He reassured her, turning back to his coffee. It was nearing the top of the mug, the liquid thinning into a trickle.

"So you guys are okay now?" _She wouldn't stop would she?_

Reluctantly he peeled his eyes away from the fresh coffee to her again. "Yes" and then to solidify it he added "absolutely." He didn't see her reaction but in his peripheral vision he saw a flash of white teeth and guessed that she was smiling again.

"Good" he heard her say but he didn't grace her with any further reply. He might have grunted though, but it was a quiet one that she probably didn't hear and Geoff was getting distracted by the smell of coffee beans. Coffee started the conversation and it was going to end it. He took the mug from the machine and walked off back into the kitchen.

The loud clanging of wine bottles started up again as he disappeared through the swinging doors, fresh coffee in hand. _God, Selena_ he thought exasperatedly.

* * *

 

 

9:30 AM  
  


Geoff burst through the swinging doors into the dining room with one name and one thing on his mind.

"Shane!"

The person he needed was leaning over a chair in the middle of a conversation with an ex-employee, or more specifically, Jojo. Shane jumped up but Jojo seemed to lower her head into the cup of coffee in front of her.

Geoff jerked his thumb back in the direction to the kitchen "You need to do the shallots now, please."

"Yep" Shane said automatically, backing away from his sister. He went into the kitchen and Geoff wandered to the front of house desk to check the amount of cancellations he would have to make from not opening today. They weren't fully booked which was a relief because Geoff _really_ didn't feel like apologising to a whole bucket list of customers over the phone or otherwise today.

The second he opened up the clientele book Jojo was speaking up from her seat at the small table.

"You look tired."

Even though Geoff was expecting it, this time around was different because it was more than just Fiona's phone call that had caused the bags under his eyes. He didn't sleep at all last night, kept awake by the nightmare haunting him and the fear that if he fell asleep then he would wake up at the same time his nightmare ended. In the end he had settled with staring at the ceiling, watching the streak of light peeking above the curtains get brighter and brighter until he heard the morning song of the birds outside.

Quickly reigning his thoughts back in Geoff steered the conversation away to other topics of concern. "Has Philip called you?" he turned back to the sleek black book and heard Jojo sigh.

"Why should he have?" Her tired impartialness reminded Geoff that at this moment in time Jojo still didn't know about Philip's struggling situation "If yer want to talk to him why don't yer ring him yerself?"

"He hasn't been answering his phone" Geoff heard himself say.

"So go 'round to his flat then." She muttered, taking a sip of her coffee.

Geoff decided then that her ignorance was too far great for him to be comfortable with. He knew what Jojo's problems were but this wasn't about her now, it was about Philip. "There is no flat, Jojo." He turned around to face her and walked around the desk to stop at her table. "Philip was homeless, that's why RAW was the best thing that ever happened to him."

Jojo was quiet, her expressive forest green eyes flickered up at him and her lips parted as words failed her. Geoff gave her no time to think of an apology, the only person she should be apologising to is Philip.

"You finished with your coffee?" Geoff gestured to her cup, paying no heed to her shock at the response of Geoff's blunt enlightenment.

She still looked in shock as she rose from her chair. Geoff stood stoically as Jojo made her way out of the restaurant. He hoped to _god_ she was going to talk things over with Philip, and if things worked out the way they did the first time around then that was going to be a given.

* * *

 

 

Later on in the morning Geoff witnessed another event working out like last time. Well, he wouldn't call it _working out_ because it was more like _a problem arising_ just like last time and actually he wasn't just witnessing, he was experiencing. And not only was he experiencing, he was actually the subject of an exploding anger that stormed right into his office, slamming the door shut. The storm set its course stalking across the office to stop at Geoff's desk where it loomed over the sitting man in his spinning chair, reading through the restaurant proposal.

Geoff was hyper aware of the anger brewing in the towering storm but he kept to his lines, glancing briefly up at the whirlwind of fury and maintaining a casual lightness to his words. "There's a, a lot of information here, must've taken you a while."

"Yes." the tone was clipped, spoken over folded arms.

Geoff swung the chair around so he faced the storm head on. From where he was sitting he could see the arm muscles twitch angrily beneath his shirt. He moved his eyes up to connect with the gentle hazel eyes but all he saw were a hard, deadly storm brewing in them. _Oh, he's pissed._ Geoff quickly looked away from them to glance over the proposal in his lap, letting himself be distracted by the colourful artwork at the side.

"Why didn't you mention it to me? I mean, we were on the phone every night." He looked into those stormy clouds, acting as casual as he could be. His obliviousness to the storm couldn't be any more ridiculous even if he popped up an umbrella and put on sound proof earmuffs. He didn't miss the moment when he said ' _mention'_ Pavel's eyes flashed, lightning striking down…and then the roar of thunder.

"Why you never _mentioned_ you were married? To a woman, Selena!"

It wasn't exactly a shout. It was like he was speaking normally but the tone was on a completely different scale. It was cold and precise and that was just –if not more- as deadly. He said Selena's name with heavy incredulity, head shaking because what _even. Married to Selena!_

Geoff tried to approach it as carefully as possible, keeping his voice light "Did she tell you that?"

Pavel raised his eyebrows, the lines in his forehead creasing in his further incredulity "It's not true?"

Selena must've made it out to be a big deal so Geoff wanted to make it clear to his pissed boyfriend that it definitely _wasn't_ the case. He didn't allow silence after Pavel's second question, instead hurrying on to explain.

"No it's true, we did get married," he said it lightly, matter-of-factly. The only indication of his nerves were the back and forth motion on his spinning chair, feet fidgeting. "But it was years ago, in London, for my visa." It felt ridiculous hearing it aloud. _Yeah, because it's so normal for people to marry solely for immigration purposes isn't it? Not illegal or anything._

It sounded ridiculous to Pavel as well. "Your visa?" He said sarcastically, still not happy. It seemed like casual wasn't winning Geoff any points but that was how it worked the first time around and Geoff was quickly running out of options.

"Yeah my _work_ visa! Yes, that's all it was Pavel." To further downplay this topic he laughed the seriousness away but the painful look in Pavel's hurt eyes made the sound die in his throat.

 _I'm such a fucking arsehole_.

He chewed at his lip and said the next words much softer "Look, Pavel, she married me so I could stay in Europe. She's a good friend." The last words weren't said with much confidence but whether Geoff liked it or not it was still true, once upon a time.

But now the expiry date on Selena's friendship had long since passed and the rotting smell was getting on Pavel's last nerves.

"Well she's not your friend anymore. She's been setting us against each other and pulling as apart." He had a frustrated look in his eye, the one where his jaw tightened and the lines above his eyebrows deepened. Geoff opened his mouth but suddenly Pavel was turning on his heel, heading for the door.

"Pa-Pavel! Pavel, where're you going?" he closed up the proposal quickly, breathing a sigh of relief when Pavel stopped and turned, his hand on the door knob.

"I'm going to speak with her." The words were spoken like a stern father going to argue with his teenage daughter but all Geoff could hear was _don't let him go yet! Don't let him leave!_

"No no, don't do that."

"Why?" Pavel challenged, arching a brow. He was still pretty pissed.

"'Cause there's something going on with her at the moment. I don't know what it is but she's desperate, say the wrong thing and she could go to the authorities, she could have me _deported_ mate." That was only the half-truth. Geoff knew exactly what was going on with her but if he handled this situation wrong everything might go sour. Deportation would _not_ be a desirable outcome because of Selena's own mess. He also needed to get the details of the restaurant which he knew _balls_ about because that had been all Pavel's work.

The words sunk in and it was quiet for a second and then Geoff saw a shadow come up the steps to the office and his office door swung open. Pavel's hand jerked away from the door knob to avoid twisting his wrist and Geoff had to bite down snapping at the rude intruder because the _hell._

"Geoff the-!" Selena's shrill voice stopped when she saw Pavel, not expecting him in the office at this time. "-pick up van's here." She finished a bit quieter in apology, smiling pleasantly at Geoff.

"Thanks." he nodded, smiling her away until she left the office hesitantly, closing the door behind her with a soft click. When she was gone he turned to Pavel. "I need to go sort out this delivery, okay?" He got up from his chair and as he passed Pavel he placed a hand on his tense arm. "Okay?"

The angry hazel eyes bore into his for a moment until Pavel sighed and his face softened, but his pursed lips told Geoff he was still pissed. "I'm going to sort this out too." He said with unshakable confidence, turning as Geoff opened the door to the office.

He placed both hands on Pavel's shoulders, smiling "I know you will" he said, landing a swift kiss on his head. "Detective Rebien." He added with a wink and left the office, leaving Pavel to stew in his thoughts. Hopefully the Detective will investigate in the right places and get some answers soon.

* * *

 

 

In the kitchen Selena and Shane were packing up the food for the delivery when the Head Chef strode up to them, calling out a checklist.

"Okay, the crayfish?" he asked the question and Selena confirmed it but he checked anyway. "Crab cakes?" he lifted the foil covered trays, checking the contents.

"Yep, here Chef" Shane said, nodding at the covered tray. As Geoff continued to snoop around the trays and delivery bags the back door to the kitchen swung open and Shane turned to see Fiona and Emma enter.

"Hey" Shane greeted them and Geoff stopped his snooping to look at Fiona, all of them asking the same question in their eyes. Emma smoothed back her 90% dyed pink hair as she stood beside Fiona.

"He's alright, it wasn't severe. He might have to cut back on the cocktails but I think we can all live with that." she shared an amused look with Emma who smiled in agreement. It was a relief that the hospital scare wasn't as serious as they'd thought.

 _Dan's a lucky bastard,_ Geoff thought fondly of the building owner, Fiona's dad. "And you're alright?" he asked as Selena handed a packed bag of food to the delivery van driver.

"Yeah, thanks Geoff." Fiona smiled, turning to leave with Emma trailing behind.

"Is Kate still at the hospital?" Shane called.

"No she's gone into town, shopping" Emma drawled, looking back but then forward again as the door Fiona went through almost knocked into her face.

And Geoff declared their impromptu break over with a light slap against Shane's arm. "C'mon, mate."

Shaking thoughts of Kate out of his head Shane turned and picked up two full trays as Geoff took the blue box and Selena picked up the other two trays.

"Where's Pavel?" She had to ask, securing her grip on the trays. There was a large part of her that took pleasure in the absence of her husband's boyfriend but the carrying and lifting was something she could really do without.

"Uh, he stepped out for a bit." Geoff tucked the box under his arm and carried a large serving plate with his other hand, motioning her to start walking.

"He picked his time well didn't he?" Selena muttered, her sarcasm tilting to the snide levels. Geoff made an exasperated face at the back of her head. _I'd say he picked the perfect time, Selena._ He thought, hoping that Detective Rebien was succeeding in whatever it is he was doing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Next Chapter: when the shit hits the fan. Coming soon. x


	4. And Harder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the penultimate chapter. Strap in!

#

10:15 AM

Geoff felt relieved when he got the phone call he was waiting for, and even more thrilled at the good news. Detective Rebien had found the incriminating evidence. All they had to do now was withdraw a hefty couple thousand euros from the bank so Geoff’s metaphorical debts to his sham-married wife would be paid off, as explained by his personal advisor Detective Rebien.

Geoff met up with him at the local high street. The ambient sounds of the city were rich with the hustle and bustle of people going through their day, the constant noise of traffic, the odd police siren and, of course, the ever-reliable Irish weather dampening the streets with the light patter of rain.

Pavel looked delectable wrapped up in his black coat, the thick collar rose at the back and folded down by his collar bone. He wasn’t wearing a scarf so the pale skin of his neck was exposed to the harsh city air. Geoff wanted nothing more than to put his lips there, to taste the skin and bury his head against the warmth. In his mind, he pictured Pavel wearing a detective hat to go with that serious detective look he was projecting. He imagined an old English-style pipe hanging from his lips as he sat in Geoff’s office chair, wearing nothing but that black coat…  


Geoff stopped his imagination right there. One reason being he was currently wearing jeans and the second being the fact that he was out in public and Pavel was _still_ wearing that black coat which would make it very _hard_ to undo the physical reaction that was, _ah shit_ …already starting. All those hours of watching criminal dramas was starting to catch up with him, morphing into a quickly developing sexual fantasy. _Damn you Pavel and your addictive box sets_.  


He buried his hands in his grey jacket pocket. _Okay, imagination over. We’re doing something important, focus_.

“You got the I.D.’s?” he exhaled a breath of warm air, chasing away the fantasies for now.

“Yes.” Pavel nodded, his hair quivered in the blowing wind. He licked his lips to moisten them from the cold. “Selena’s in a lot of trouble, Geoff. We have to do this.”  


They really did, Geoff knew. Despite all what Selena had done and their mutual dislike of each other Pavel still wanted to help her out of this mess. _This mess worth five thousand pounds, what the hell Selena?_ But money aside, it was a trait of Pavel’s that Geoff had to admire.  


It wasn’t exactly complete forgiveness, (because Pavel was still acting a bit frosty towards him for the whole married-to-Selena secret thing and yes, _okay_ , maybe he did deserve that.) but it was a way of dealing with situations that paid no heed to the bullshit-childish-squabbling and focused on the important matters first. Which was, first things first, to stop Selena from going to jail. 

“Okay, let’s go.” Geoff said, bumping into Pavel’s shoulders to get him to start walking and they headed down the noisy street. Even with the cold wind whipping his face red and his bare fingers slowly going numb, Geoff delighted in the feel of warmth seeping through Pavel’s black coat. He found he didn’t really mind the cold at all.

#

10:45 AM

Back at RAW, Geoff had to quash down _another_ bout of unruly imagination as Pavel walked into his office, shrugging off his black coat to hook it on the coat rack in the corner. He leant against the metal filing bureau and crossed his arms, posture full of seriousness.

After Geoff hooked up his own coat and chucked the package down he dropped into his office chair, spinning a full circle. “Alright Detective Rebien, how do you want to do the interrogation?” He placed both ands flat on his desk, looking at Pavel. The way his other half was standing Geoff couldn’t help envisioning him with a pipe between those long fingers, looking thoughtfully down the smoking line. His hazel eyes slid to Geoff’s and he rose a single dark brow. 

“Interrogation?”

“Yeah you know, good cop bad cop style…?” He trailed off as Pavel gave him a really? Look.

“Geoff, we have to do this _properly_.”

“Yes, I know…” his words and teasing grin died as a shadow passed the office window. _Show time_. “Here she comes.” 

# 

All Selena knew was that they needed her in the office. However, whether it was too cliché or not, being called into the office in the first place was what first sent alarm bells off in her head. The other red flag she noticed, as she opened the door to the office, was the way the two men positioned themselves.

Pavel was near the entrance, leaning against something with his arms crossed. He had probably bitched to Geoff about their little conversation and Geoff had obviously believed him because then he wouldn’t be sitting behind his desk leaning back in his ‘Boss Mode’. He was no doubt going to chew her out as well. 

“I see,” the word was punctuated by the slam of the door, “so your boyfriend wants to kick me out into the street.” The words were addressed to Geoff, only acknowledging Pavel with a tilt of the head as she pronounced ‘boyfriend’ with an acidic PH level in the minuses.

Pavel turned away from her to roll his eyes at Geoff. He was done with her childish act. “Just _listen_ , Selena.” He sighed, clearly exasperated. Geoff took that as his cue.

“Take a seat.” he gestured to the empty seat opposite him.

Selena dropped down into the seat and faced Geoff head-on, eyebrow raised and attitude blazing. She was ready to take on whatever he threw at her. “What happened Geoff? We used to be friends.”

_Key word: used to be_ , Geoff thought grimly “You, coming here under false pretences, that’s what happened Selena.”

“’False pretences’, what _false pretences?_ ” Selena looked genuinely puzzled, Geoff could even go as far to say she looked mildly insulted to even have those words insinuated at her. He could have almost believed her if it wasn’t for Detective Rebien stepping in, effectively ending the bullshitting. There was only so much of it he could take and, quite honestly, it was starting to stink up the room.

“We know about the money.” He said bluntly.

Geoff could see Selena’s momentary shock, the widening of her eyes, which quickly changed to wariness. Whatever she said now wouldn't make any difference because her long silence already answered the question for them. 

Guilty. 

“What money?” She asked weakly, too late, still grasping at broken straws.

Geoff decided to end her suffering “The five thousand pounds you took from the restaurant in London.” He picked up the incriminating paper from the desk and spun it at her. It landed lopsidedly but Selena recognised it and felt her hopes crash because now there was no running away from it, the gig was up.

“Did you call them? Did you tell them where I was?” With the startling realisation panic crept into her voice. That paper had a lot of details on it, including some less sensitive bank details of the transaction. _How the hell did they find that? That was her copy_.

At the side Detective Rebien had pursed his mouth into a hard line. Geoff took note that a pissed off serious Pavel was fucking sexy.

“Yes.” Pavel said gravely. Selena whipped her head around to stare at him in horror. _He didn’t…_ she thought, but Pavel didn’t look like he was joking. _He did_ …

“Great.” She sighed.

Pavel glanced at Geoff for him to make a comment but found his boyfriend staring at him so intensely, _he’s been acting so strange lately_ , and decided that he might as well take over the rest of the _interrogation_ as Geoff had so eloquently put it. He sat up a bit more, absently scratching at his shaved jaw. 

“The people you stole from,” Selena winced at the word “have agreed _not_ to call the police.”

All of Selena’s bravado had gone now, leaving her hanging onto Pavel’s every word like a lost child listening to someone telling her where they last saw her mother. “What…” she said weakly. She was half-expecting them to say that the police were on their way and they were just letting her know that they would testify in court to maximise her prison sentence but _what…? No police? After everything she had done?_

Her doe-eyed confusion made Detective Rebien take pity on her, if only a bit. His face softened a fraction as he explained further.

“ _If_ you go back to explain yourself and pay back what you took,” he paused, sharing a look with Geoff; his boyfriend had made an offhand joke about mafias about this and Pavel could see he was holding back a smirk now. _Geoff + boxsets + never ending imagination = never ending grief_. But Pavel focused on Selena now, feeling strangely like a stern father from the way she was looking at him. “Believe it or not, they were actually quite worried about you.”

She looked down, her dark hair hanging low like curtains of shame framing her pale made-up face. “Well I can’t pay them back so…” she shrugged, trying not to let it show how much her heart was racing in fear, the blind panic that drove her to them in the first place. The conditions couldn’t be kept so that meant them calling the police, pressing charges, _jail time_ …

“You can.” The offhanded comment made Selena jerk up again, god this whole conversation was going to give her whiplash, but that wasn’t even important because _what? You can…_ she had heard that right? _You can you can you can_. Pavel wasn’t even looking at her, he said the words to the quietly watching Geoff who took that as his cue to pick up the padded envelope of withdrawn money and throw it down in front of her.

For a second Selena looked scared to take it, as if it contained the handcuffs she was going to be arrested with, but then she reached out and took it, opening it up hesitantly and peering inside. She slowly pulled some of the contents out and saw wads of one hundred-euro notes. Just by looking at the first wad she knew there was a lot of money in there. _This is all the five thousand pounds_ she realised. 

“Where did you get this?” Her voice was quiet. 

“From the bank.” Geoff said, matter-of-factly. “From my account. Ah-and Pavel’s.” he tilted his head in Detective Rebien’s direction who confirmed it with a solid nod. Dream-Pavel was now twirling the lit pipe in his fingers, a dirty smirk aimed at Geoff that made his whole-body flush with heat and- _stop! God_ …Geoff closed his eyes for a second, chasing the fantasy away. 

“It was actually Pavel’s idea.” He said, resuming his train of thought. Selena looked down as Geoff spoke, never did she think Pavel would be the one to pull out the stops, ending the game that she now regretted stringing them along on. She seriously underestimated that man. 

“He said that I owed you something.” Geoff continued and then, sharply, the sound of finality. “And now I don’t.”

The last words made Selena look up. She saw the hard look in his eyes, saw the arched eyebrow and _god help her_ she even heard the snip of the scissors cutting the last straw and she knew.

The game was up.

#

11:30 AM

Later, Geoff found himself walking through the dining room reading through the reservations folder that he had already read before when he heard Fiona approaching. Her signature heels loud on the hard floor. 

“Any hassle with the cancellations?” she asked, following behind him.

“Uh, no they’re okay.” Geoff flicked through another page “I, uh, promised them some extra special treatment next time I made a booking. A few have already, actually.”

“Oh, that’s good.” Fiona was always happy with special treatment, always looking for new ways to make RAW better than their competition. If she always had it her way they would be having a _special treatment_ spa day every Friday.

“Uh, Ed dropped by earlier too.” He threw the stone out there, glancing up from the folder to watch the ripples take place.

Fiona’s pleasant face seemed to freeze in place, making her look like a robot. Geoff’s imagination saw Robot-Fiona tilt her head to the side, the joints whirring by the movement. 

“Will that be all sir?” she would say mechanically. Even blinking would make a whirring sound. She would be the newest model of artificial intelligence-

_Alright we get it_ , Geoff aborted the warped reality before it went too far. _Robot Fiona, now focus on the Real Fiona. Did she say something?_ Geoff blinked, he had asked about Ed and she didn’t really look all that animated, hence…Robot Fiona, which turned her stiff head to look at him. “Analysing…zero records found for ‘Robot Fiona’.”

_Alright Geoff leave the imagination to rest now. Remember, Ed. Real Fiona didn’t look so peachy...? We'll take it from there._

“Things not going so well there?” He probed. The collateral damage between Fiona and Ed was always going to be the restaurant and Geoff had to make sure their assets were still safe.

“Don’t worry, it won’t get between you and your vegetables.” Fiona smirked. 

“Ah, that’s good.” He had to crack a smile at the vegetable reference “But if it does, it does, right?” he arched a brow.

Fiona paused, and in that pause the door to the kitchen swung open, signalling someone’s arrival. She pulled the folder out of his hands “Are you finished with this?” He barely had time to respond as she snapped it shut, loudly, ending the conversation. _Funny, she was comfortable talking about RAW but the moment I mention Ed it’s like a wire comes loose_. “Thank you.” She graced a sarcastic smile at him as she walked around him. “Pavel.”

“Hi Fiona.” 

Geoff whipped around to see his boyfriend exchanging smiles with Fiona. His bad mood had lifted a lot since their little talk with Selena, thank God, so Pavel was all smiles as he passed him. In his hand he carried a black circular tray used for carrying glasses. 

“Pavel!” Geoff quickly went into step with him as he walked past, heading for the bar. “Thank you very much for before.” If it wasn’t for his investigative instincts they would probably still be stuck with Selena, _but then maybe we wouldn’t each be two and a half thousand euros poorer_. “And Pavel, I _will_ pay you back.” At his words Pavel turned with a noncommittal shrug as he went behind the bar.

“I don’t care about that." He placed the tray on the bar top and fished out a pale cloth to polish the glasses with. When Geoff settled onto the bar stool Pavel gave him a cheeky look as he reached for the first glass. It was a look eerily similar to the naughty smirk of Geoff's Fantasy Detective. "All what matters is that Selena is finally leaving the flat."

Geoff had to laugh aloud at that "I see, and I thought you were actually worried about her."

Pavel shrugged again, his hand twisting a wine glass around the cloth. "I was, but now I'm not." His eyes narrowed in on the glass as he held it up to the light to check for fingerprints. "We've done all we can to help her, now it's up to her."

Geoff nodded, watching silently as Pavel placed the glass on the tray and picked up another one. Just for laughs he added "And what if she wanted to stay for a few more days?"

Immediately Pavel stopped polishing and shot Geoff a dark glare. "Geoff...don't even _joke_ about that."

Geoff held up his hands in surrender, fighting back a smile. "Yes! Alright, sorry." Lifting the glare, Pavel went back to polishing and Geoff drummed his fingers on the bar, watching him work.

For a moment, he felt like he was in a Bond film, sitting at a bar of a Casino. _The bartender with the hazel eyes looked up from the cloth and glass, recognising him as that secretive regular._

__

_"Your usual, sir?" he would ask, nimble fingers already getting the glass._

__

_His own enigmatic self would give a sharp nod "A whiskey on the rocks if you would mate. Just put it on my tab."_

__

_The bartender gave him a salacious look, hazel eyes smouldering "Your name?" the question was just for formalities but it gave Geoff the opening to say his signature line. The line where right before it he would sit up a bit straighter and one eyebrow would arch arrogantly as his voice drops by an octave, tipped off with a smoulder that could melt fucking diamonds._

__

 

__

_"Bondi"_

__

_Oh yeah..._

"Geoff, are you okay?"

Pavel's voice jerked him out of his little daydream. The luxurious red and gold of the Casino Royale dissolved around him and he was left with Pavel looking at him strangely. 

"Uh...hmm?"

Pavel just chuckled, not mentioning the hilarious way Geoff was nodding slowly to himself, a ridiculous smug smirk plastered across his face. He decided to spare Geoff the embarrassment. 

"Don't you need to be somewhere?" he finished his third glass and placed it with the other two on the tray.

Geoff thought about that for a second. _Did he need to be somewhere?_ There wasn't anything that immediately jumped to mind. "Can't I sit here and watch my boyfriend work?" he challenged, making Pavel roll his eyes as he rolled a new glass around the cloth.

"No, you can't." He shook his head, chuckling at Geoff's affronted look. Pavel set the glass down and reached out over the bar to place his hand over Geoff's. "I'm sorry Geoff, but I can't work with you staring at me like that." he patted the hand in consolation and picked up the half-polished glass again.

Against his permission, Geoff found himself smiling so, quickly correcting it, he turned the smile upside down and pouted with as much dignity as he could keep. "Okay, I see how it is.” He slid off the stool, leaving Pavel to polish in peace. “I’ll go bug Shane then, he’s probably taking his lunch early, the lazy bastard.” It was only quarter to twelve but still…that was still too early.

He had almost left the dining room, not that far from the bar, when an uneasy feeling made him pause. It was a nagging feeling, like when his body had forgotten something before him, an alarm going off in his subconscious. But what was wrong with this picture? Pavel behind the bar, polishing glasses, okay…but what-

The alarm was getting louder.

_But what?_ His heart started to beat faster. _What’s wrong with this picture?_

He tried to remember but he just couldn’t place it.

_What…_

And then it all fell into place with a single sound.

A familiar melody playing along with a vibration in his pocket.

His mobile ringing.

And then all the memories bubbled over.

_“Yes?” He answered the phone, hyper aware of Pavel’s negative energy behind the bar. “Ah, right they must be in the fridge. Come over…’kay.”_

_Pavel took another glass, attacking it with the cloth._

_“Ah, it’s the gallery, they left the deserts behind.” Geoff slid off the stool “Pick up’s on its way.”_

_Pavel didn’t even look at him. The issue with the restaurant made the atmosphere tense, one wrong word and everything would go to hell. ___

____

_But Geoff wanted to focus on the delivery now, Prague would have to wait until he had the time to properly address their conflicting interests. He faced Pavel before he left, hoping that he would put it behind them for the moment._

_“Yeah?” he encouraged, but his efforts were in vain because he didn’t even get spared a glance by Pavel. Sighing resignedly Geoff walked away from the bar, heading for the kitchen and leaving Pavel behind to polish the glasses._

_The glasses._

_Glass._

Another memory quickly resurfaced. _Broken glass scattered everywhere on the floor before the bar._

_Fiona calling him, her voice loud and urgent in his ear._

_“Geoff, its Pavel!”_

_Pavel rubbing the back of his head, a dazed look in his eye. “He attacked me.”_

Cutting through like an unexpected slap, claws and all, was the haunting memory of blank eyes staring into nothing.

_Then Jojo’s voice._

_“I’m so sorry Geoff.”_

_“Blunt head trauma…they said he might have hit his head.”_

The memory morphed back into the one at the bar. _Pavel wincing as he held his head, refusing Geoff’s suggestion of calling the doctor._

_“All what they will say is to keep an eye on me and…you can do that, can’t you?”_

_Geoff nodding, still rattled from the attack. “I can, yes.”_

_The feel of Pavel’s dead weight against him assaulted his senses. The dead look in Pavel’s eyes as Geoff cried over his body._

_No…he couldn’t._

And as quickly as it came the memories left, the alarm went dead, emphasising the harsh silence of the present. Geoff was back at the bar.

His gut dropped harshly. The horrible flashback reminded him that this situation was not a free pocket in the day. He should have realised when Fiona had asked him about the reservations. From then he should have realised. Now, awakening harshly to rapid awareness Geoff realised. He had overslept in his blissful ignorance and only with the cold slap reminder he woke up. He recognised the sequence of events and knew that there wasn't much time left. _Fucking hell_ , he had _really_ overslept.

_Ring!_

__

The vibrating phone in his pocket was still ringing but he couldn’t bring himself to answer the call. He felt sick to his stomach.

It was still going to happen.

It was happening _now_.

Geoff wanted to curse. He wanted to use the dirtiest words and fling them to high heaven. He wanted to scream until his throat went hoarse. He wanted to…

But he didn’t.

There was nothing he could say.

He stared at Pavel behind the bar, twisting a glass in the cloth. He was oblivious to the unfolding nightmare. Over the shrill ringing of the phone Geoff heard him release a loud sigh. Pavel put the glass down and leant against the bar, raising his eyebrows in question. “Geoff, what is it?”

Geoff swallowed. Pavel’s penetrative hazel eyes made his mouth dry and he looked away from them to the newly polished glasses.

_They won’t be so pretty when they’re scattered across the floor in pieces._

“I know when something’s wrong, Geoff.” Pavel continued to probe “You haven’t been yourself lately-”

“J-Just a minute Pavel.” Cutting him off Geoff fished his ringing phone out of his pocket, answering with a terse “Yes?”

Pavel watched him for a moment as he spoke to whoever was on the other line until with pursed lips he pushed away from the bar and picked up the glass again. This time, he kept a close eye on him as he cleaned and when Geoff ended the call Pavel paused briefly in his action, silently asking a question.

“That was the gallery.” Geoff explained, trying to sound casual, but Pavel was watching him and he noticed several things which sparked off his alarm. He heard the straining in the words, he saw the flex of his throat as he swallowed down a clawing worry and the dangerous unsteadiness to the way Geoff was standing looked like he was about to keel over.

“Geoff!” Ignoring the glasses completely Pavel shot around the bar and quickly steadied him by the arms. “Geoff, I think you should take a break.” Something in his words must have registered with Geoff because the man nodded shakily and so Pavel led him back to sit down at the bar.

Something was definitively off about Geoff. He had a weird feeling the morning he was woken up by Geoff’s choked cries in the quiet darkness of the early morning. There was something just…off. He didn’t know what it was but something had happened to Geoff in that dream last night and it still hadn’t left him.

“It’s ah…the delivery.” Geoff rubbed his chest absently and took a deep breath. “They forgot the deserts.”

Pavel nodded, his face was so concerned it was almost dizzying “Alright, and the real reason?”

Geoff snorted, hyperaware of his trembling hand he had stuffed into his cardigan. “I wasn’t making it up, Pavel.”

Pavel shook his head, reiterating “Yes I know. I mean, the reason why you’re not acting like yourself today? The reason why you almost had a panic attack right now?” the words were hushed in that distinct concerned-Pavel way, even though there was no one else in the room.

Intense hazel eyes stared him down and Geoff felt his resolve breaking under it. He lowered his hand from his chest and took a deep breath.

“Are…are you almost done?” Geoff nodded to the shiny glasses Pavel had abandoned. He didn’t seem so interested in them anymore, and Pavel confirmed his hopes with an indifferent shrug.

“I only have a few more to do.” He said, unsure of what Geoff was getting at. The man looked like Armageddon was coming. There was a desperate look in his eye as he hopped off the stool and took Pavel’s hand.

“Why don’t you come with me for a while then?” He almost pleaded, there was no way Geoff was going to leave Pavel alone in the bar.

Pavel resisted the hand pulling, confused with the turn of actions. “What-Geoff just wait,” Geoff stopped and Pavel recollected himself. “Where?”

Geoff floundered for a second “Uh…early lunch?”

“Early lunch.” Pavel repeated dryly. He knew Geoff was just trying to distract him but he went along with it “Wait, what was it you said about Shane taking an early break?” he cocked his head, but all Geoff could see was that head lolling off his shoulder as he clutched onto his limp body, willing life back into it. “A what? A lazy bast-”

“-Yes, I did say that.” Geoff interrupted quickly. Time was ticking. For a second Geoff considered just locking all the restaurant doors, but it was the middle of the day and there were still staff in the building and Pavel would _definitely_ think him a man possessed if he did that. So, with heavy reluctance he refrained from it.

“Just come with me to the kitchen, please.”

Pavel still didn’t budge. Geoff knew he wanted to have a proper talk but the time was screaming at him, there was no time for talk anymore, just _move_ and move _now_.

“Please Pavel! Only quickly, I need help with the deserts.” There was no point quashing his desperation now, Geoff just needed Pavel away from the bar and out of the dining room as quick as humanely possible.

After what felt like an eternity Pavel sighed.

“Okay.”

_Thank god_. Geoff’s rising paranoia made him glance at the doors and immediately fear gripped his heart as he saw a shadow pass it.

_Shit…fuck-!_

But luckily that was all the shadow did, just pass, and his heart could beat again.

_Fucking shit_ …he exhaled shakily.

“Alright let’s go!” Geoff pulled him along but Pavel twisted himself around, pulling out of the grip and turning towards the bar again.

“Wait! Let me just get these first.” He started putting the polished glasses on the black tray. Geoff could hear his heart pulsing in his ears. “How do they say? Save the two trips?” Pavel said as he balanced the tray with one hand while placing the last tall glass on the tray.

“Something like that.” Geoff heard himself say over the rushing blood in his ears and Pavel turned around again, one hand balancing the tray of glasses.

“Okay, I’m ready.”

“Alright so get going!” Geoff waved him on hurriedly. They started walking out of the dining room and with Geoff ghosting Pavel’s steps he bit his tongue on urging Pavel to move faster. Time was beating erratically in his chest.

It eased when they entered the kitchen; the sterile white and silver metallic colours a stark change from the woodsy brown and red of the dining room and bar. Leaning against a counter was the talented kitchen minion, Philip and beside him the recently-promoted kitchen scullion, Emma.

Pavel smiled at them in greeting and Geoff pretended to look surprised at seeing Philip. Despite having experienced this moment before Geoff still didn't exactly know _why_ the boy was trying to talk to him. Whatever it was, it couldn't be more important than getting Pavel out of the danger zone so he decided to stick with the script. On the other hand though, Philip being here meant Jojo had spoken to him, so that was good.

“Philip!” he stopped in his tracks.

The boy was nervous. He fidgeted as he pushed away from the counter. It was always scary attempting to talk to the Chef. Even though Geoff had helped him many times before with his personal problems or goals it still wasn’t wise to cross him when he was busy, especially if he was trying to say he was leaving RAW.

_Geoff…Chef, my dad’s taking me back home. I can’t work here anymore. I’m sorry, thanks for all your help. I just…I can’t disappoint my dad again._

Geoff was watching him now. It was now or never. Philip took a shaky breath.

_Come on, I can talk to Geoff. Stop being nervous, Geoff will be mad but he’ll understand._

“I just uhm…er, I wanted to say thank you and-”

Geoff held up a finger, halting the boy like a trained pup. “Hold that thought mate, okay? One sec.” He moved around Philip, ignoring the agonised puppy look that followed him.

“I can’t wait-”

“Yes you can, easiest thing in the world.” Geoff didn’t spare him a glance as he headed to the back of the kitchen “Emma! Come with me.”

“Yes Chef.” Emma was supposed to act as Philip’s moral support but Geoff had delayed their plans so shooting Philip an apologetic glance she pushed away from the counter and trudged after the boss.

“You grab the cheesecake, I’ll get the torch.” Geoff ordered to her in quick succession. Philip looked to Pavel for help but he just shrugged.

Suddenly, before Geoff reached the supply cupboard, he stopped and almost collided with Emma. Geoff swung around and pointed straight at his watching other half standing beside Philip.

“Pavel! You come with me.” Geoff motioned him over and Pavel rose a brow but nodded, he twisted around to scan the room.

“I’ll just put these down.” Pavel was still holding the glasses so Geoff nodded once, backing out of the door slowly until he stopped at the threshold. “Alright so…be quick, okay?” Emma folded her arms in front of her boss. _What a surprise, the no-time-to-waste busy-busy Chef suddenly had all the time in the world to wait for Pavel but no time to talk to Philip_ Emma couldn’t stop thinking, cursing the Head Chef, internally of course.

“Yeah, I’ll only be a moment.” Pavel said distractedly, his back to Geoff.

In all honesty, Geoff would have stood stock-still for twenty minutes to wait for Pavel but kitchen scullion Cinder-emma was already giving him dark looks so he was forced to turn and head into the storeroom. Emma turned her head to share a mutual confused shrug with Philip before going through the same door but changing direction to go into the fridge.

Pavel found a suitable place to put the glasses and as he carefully set the tray down he looked sideways at Philip. The boy was still standing in the same place where Geoff left him. He looked so morose that Pavel took pity on him.

“Don’t feel bad,” he assured the boy, and tense bright eyes met his. “Geoff has been acting strange all day.”

Some of the tension in Philip’s shoulders eased as he sighed. “I really need to tell him something, but he won’t listen!”

Pavel sighed, remembering the time when he used to feel like that. “The best thing to do is say it quick, no waiting for a quiet moment. It’s hard to…pin him down.” The corners of Pavel’s thin lips quirked up at that but, thankfully, Philip didn’t catch it.

Phillip nodded in agreement, he guessed that was true in a way. “Yeah, he listens to you though.” As he spoke the words he gave Pavel a look. It took the Front of House manager a few seconds to realise what the boy was insinuating.

“Philip, if you want me to talk to Geoff for you-”

“-No no, it was a silly idea anyway” Philip sighed “I have to tell him myself.”

Pavel held his gaze to make sure, when he was satisfied he relented “Alright then.” He did a quick count of the glasses whilst Philip milled around, waiting for Geoff to come out of the storeroom. The storeroom where Pavel had to be more than a minute ago.

_Wait a minute._

Pavel counted the glasses again, slower.

_…six, seven…_

“Great” he sighed. Fiona would not be impressed by glasses left lying around the bar, especially if it was the Front of House manager’s mess. “Philip,” He called the boy’s attention “if Geoff asks, tell him I’ve gone to get the rest of the glasses at the bar.”

“Uh, okay.” Philip wasn’t so sure about making the Chef wait but this was Pavel so…well, it didn’t really matter anyway because the guy had already disappeared through the swinging doors into the dining room.

It was just Philip in the kitchen now and he folded his arms as he leant against the counter once again. The stainless steel cold and hard against his elbow.

_If only I said it quick enough, I could be meeting my dad now. At least then he wouldn’t think I had changed my mind_. Even if the idea of staying was scarily better than going with his dad Philip knew that he couldn’t disappoint his old man again. He had to leave RAW and he’ll tell Geoff just that when he eventually comes out of the st-

“Pavel!” Geoff burst through the back door, his loud entrance made Philip jump in surprise.

“Chef!”

“Where’s Pavel?” Geoff shot the question at the startled pup. _Why wasn’t Pavel in the kitchen?_

“He, uhm, went to get the rest of the glasses.”

A sinking feeling of dread made Geoff’s blood run cold.

“At the bar?” _No, please make it a no. No, please don’t say_ …

“Yeah. Um, Geoff, there’s something I need tell you. I’m…leaving.”

But Geoff didn’t even listen this time. He rushed past Philip, racing towards the dining room like the devil was after him. Philip watched him leave and sighed. Leaning back against the counter top once again, he thought fleetingly of how angry his dad would be right now.

#

A Moment Before

There weren’t many glasses left, only three on the side, so it was an easy job to get them on a new black tray. Pavel turned around and the moment he did the front doors of the restaurant were thrust open and a middle-aged man with grey balding hair stepped in.

Pavel startled at the entrance, but then composed himself to aim a polite smile at the customer. “I’m sorry sir, we’re closed today.”

“Where is he?” the man’s voice was rough and impatient, like the tone of someone who had grown tired of running in circles.

“Where is who?” Pavel quizzed. The man would have to do better than that.

“I’m looking for my son.” His gravelly voice was much clearer, perhaps from calming down the frustration of running around the block. The added politeness was much appreciated because Pavel had long since stopped tolerating customers treating him like dirt. But manners aside, the question was still too vague and he walked towards the man, frowning.

“I don’t know who you’re talking about, sir.”

And then the calmness snapped, a simmering temper, unknown to Pavel like a silent rattle snake, made itself known. The hard lines of the man deepened along with his snarl.

“You’re lying to me!”

The hidden bull inside the man reared its ugly head and Pavel stepped back reflexively. _A drunk?_ He guessed, but the man didn't smell of any alcohol.

His focus left Pavel, scanning the dining room. "I know he's here somewhere." He began to march further in but Pavel side stepped him, cutting him off.

It all happened very quickly.

Pavel tried to reason with the man "You can't just-!"

"Get out of my way!" The man was suddenly charging at him and in that second there was a third voice. Geoff's voice.

"PAVEL!"

#

A Second Earlier

Geoff heard the shouting before he saw them.

"Get out of my way!"

_Fuck!_

He turned the corner and saw Pavel's back, the tray of glasses balanced in one hand. The yelling man he vaguely recognised to be Philip's dad was rushing straight at Pavel.

It all happened very slowly.

Geoff was too far away. He couldn't reach Pavel in time. But his voice could.

Mustering up as much volume as his lungs could provide he hollered down the room.

"PAVEL!"

It didn’t do much. Of course it didn’t. It didn’t do fucking _shit_ and Geoff watched in sickly slow motion as the man shoved his Pavel, hard, and Geoff was still sprinting towards them as he saw Pavel lose his grip on the tray of glasses. It went flying up, glinting in the reflecting sun of the restaurant windows as he went down, falling backwards over a dark wooden coffee table.

And then his head slammed against the edge.

The glasses smashed as they fell, scattering the floor with shimmering shards.

Pavel automatically recoiled from the impact, a hand went to the back of his head. In his daze, his body rolled off the table and crashed onto the glass-covered floor.

He didn’t move.

_No, no, no…_ Geoff felt helpless as he ran to him. Philip’s dad was about to march past Pavel but at seeing Geoff he quickly changed direction, not leaving the restaurant but taking the alternative route to the kitchen. Geoff didn’t go after him. Instead, he reached Pavel and fell to his knees beside him. The shards cut at his skin but he was more worried for the unconscious Pavel laying in the middle of it all.

“P-Pavel!” Geoff choked out. He placed a hand against Pavel’s warm cheek but got no response. "Shit!"

Geoff had never seen the actual attack, only the aftermath when Fiona and Selena were standing by Pavel who was talking about what had happened. So now having witnessed the whole thing and kneeling beside the unresponsive Pavel Geoff couldn't stop himself from panicking.

_Alright, calm down. He isn't dead. Pavel isn't dead. He fell on the fucking glass! He hit his fucking head! Fuck, fuck, FUCK!_

Geoff patted his cheek, trying to rouse him through his own rising hysteria. "Wake up baby...Hey...P-Pavel."

Nothing.  


_"I didn't get anything."_ He hears Fiona's grim voice echoing and repeating in his mind. Then Jojo’s anguished _"I'm so sorry, Geoff.”_

And defying those memories was Pavel. Right now, in the living nightmare in a hazardous bed of glass. His smooth forehead creased into frown lines as he groaned, his eyes pinched against the light.

_Thank fucking God_ , Geoff sighed in relief as he watched Pavel’s eyelids fluttering.

"Ugh, what..." he mumbled, squinting up at Geoff’s slightly blurry face. For a few scary moments it felt like he was underwater, Geoff’s dark curls and his face stretching and wobbling like slow ripples against the surface.

The mirage-vision cleared when he felt a sharp prod at his arm, his ankle also felt scratched by something and even though it didn’t immediately hurt if he put pressure on whatever was pricking him it would start to cut him.

"Don't move Pavel, there's glass everywhere." Geoff said over him, watching as Pavel’s squinting eyes opened a bit more, focusing on him and then squinting again as he groaned. His hair was mussed haphazardly across his forehead so Geoff moved it to the side with a gentle finger.

"My head." Pavel groaned, then winced at the throbbing pain, a hand rose to touch it gingerly but Geoff's warm hand closed over his wrist.

“I know, I know. Just, be still for a moment, okay?"

Pavel shot him an unimpressed look. Somehow, he could still pull it off through a pained grimace and laying awkwardly atop of broken glass. “Geoff, help me off the floor.”

Geoff floundered for a minute as he thought of how he was going to do this, but then Pavel held a hand out so he gripped it firmly, mindful of the scattered glass.

“A-Alright, okay…just, take it easy.” Geoff slowly helped Pavel up and once he was back on his feet again he rolled his neck, his hand coming up to rub at his head. “Take it easy.” Geoff guided him across the glass covered floor, their feet crunching over the weaker shards, over towards the bar.

“Who was the guy?” Pavel kept his hand at his head, trying to calm the throbbing. With a painful lurch Geoff was reminded of when his hand moved erratically through that dark head of hair, trembling beyond control, rocking against Pavel’s weight in desperation.

“I-I don’t know” Geoff stammered, trying to stop the crushing memories. _That isn’t going to happen again. I can stop it. I can…_ “Come and sit down.” He pulled out a bar stool and Pavel sat down, massaging his neck gingerly and all Geoff could think was _doctordoctordoctorhospitalhospital_ “I’m going to call the doctor.” Geoff said, reaching for his phone, but Pavel objected.

“I’m fine, I’m okay.” He waved his other hand, sighing through another grimace.

_Fucking hell you’re not fine, Pavel!_ Geoff wanted to scream. He wanted to shake him and make him see, make him see how _not_ okay this whole situation is. Fucking _hell_.

“I’m still going to call the doctor.” There wasn’t going to be an ending where Pavel didn’t at least go to a hospital and get his head checked over at least a dozen times.

“Geoff, honestly-”

“I’m going to call him, okay? A head injury is serious.” At this point Geoff couldn’t care less if the doctor was Doctor Tosser. That infuriating man would still be worried for Pavel’s welfare, he was Pavel’s ex after all.

From hearing that tone Pavel knew it would be pointless to argue with him so he relented, dropping his hand from his head. “Fine.”

Geoff nodded, taking his phone out “Good, so-”

He stopped. The sound of yelling echoed down from the hall. There was a second of confusion but then, like a switch, Geoff’s eyes widened in alarm and he pushed away from the bar, dashing to the kitchen.

“Shit, Philip!”

#

It never really got into a full-blown fist fight when Geoff arrived. When he ran down the hall and saw them it looked more like a stand down between father and son. Philip was taller than his dad but wasn’t as muscular or heavy as he was so he towered over the older man but they both knew if it got into a weight-throwing fight there would be no question as to who would win. They were teetering dangerously close to that line; the air was heavy with tension.

“Go on, do the big man!” His dad taunted, fiery eyes challenging Philip to cross that line. _Go on, hit yer dad_.

Philip breathed angrily through his nose. He would do it. _Don’t let me cross that line, dad_ he silently begged him. But his dad was going to attack Emma and that gave rise to something hot and aggressive within him. He would cross that line if he had no choice so Philip glared murder at him, unwilling to back down.

He was relieved when Geoff’s shout interrupted their stare down. But it didn’t end it.

“Hey! What’s this?” The Head Chef stormed in from the corridor. Pavel appeared at the kitchen entrance as well but didn’t go any further.

“Let’s go.” His dad grumbled darkly, flashing eyes daring him to disobey. Geoff’s presence stopped any physical violence and Philip’s dad knew he couldn’t do anything to force his son to leave. Though out of these premises were a different story.

Philip didn’t move, reigning in his anger “I’m not going anywhere.”

And then his dad voiced what his eyes were screaming “I’m warning you, Philip.”

But biological authority bounced right off the younger boy. “Come on then!” He spat and stepped closer, taunting him to cross that line. The man had abused his rights for far too long now and Philip no longer saw him as his father. He couldn’t tell him what to do anymore.

The older man saw that change in his son now.

“I said come on!” Philip glared him down defiantly.

Philip’s dad knew he had lost this fight. Well, he had finished waiting for his son. He was done. Face twisting angrily, he turned to face that annoying Australian Chef. “You’re welcome to him,” and he pushed past his son, heading for the fire exit. “He was always useless anyway!”

When he left, the heavy door slamming shut behind him, Geoff turned to Philip. His face was flushed red from anger.

"You alright?” he asked quietly and Philip nodded, not trusting his voice. His dad had left, and Philip knew he wasn’t coming back.

It was a relief, but he didn’t feel like celebrating.

#

Fiona Kelly got the shock of her life walking into the dining room. She stopped in her tracks at the broken glass all over the floor.

_What the hell had happened?_

“What happened here!?” Fiona yelled over her shoulder. _Someone_ had to be responsible for this mess. _Where was Pavel?_ She swore that guy had his great days but some days Fiona regretted promoting him to Front of House manager because...well, look at this mess! And _where was Pavel!?_

“Pavel!” Fiona was angry, beyond angry. Quickly hurrying to the pissed business woman, Selena entered the room by the other door near the main entrance and her eyebrows rose into her hairline at the broken mess.

“Oh, wow.”

Fiona shook her head in disbelief at the floor and turned expectantly when at the far end of the room the kitchen door swung open and Pavel, Emma, Philip and Geoff trudged through. The mood in the small group was sombre, but Fiona wasn’t interested in their current mental state, she wanted to know who was responsible for her restaurant looking like an absolute _tip_.

“Can someone explain this!” Fiona demanded. Geoff looked the most troubled out of the four so she pinned her sights on him. “Geoff, what is this?”

The Head Chef opened his mouth but what came out was Philip’s voice.

“It was my dad, Fiona. He just burst into the kitchen and totally lost it.” The boy fidgeted under the attention. Emma put a hand on his shoulder, still shaken up herself from the confrontation.

Fiona gestured to the glass on the floor. “And what happened here?”

As the four came closer Philip took surprise at the broken glass. He genuinely didn’t know how that happened. His confused puppy eyes moved to Fiona’s waiting face and he opened his mouth to say he had no idea but what came out was Geoff’s voice instead.

“The _prick_ attacked Pavel, that’s what happened, Fiona.” Geoff had an arm around Pavel’s waist and he felt Pavel’s warm hand press against the small of his back, _it’s okay_ it said, but Geoff just held him closer, cursing his inability to stop everything from going to absolute _shit_. His jaw tightened, holding back the urge to scream, or cry. Pavel pursed his lips, staring at the broken glass grimly.

“Attacked?” Selena repeated quietly. She may not like Pavel very much but never had she desired for him to get physically hurt.

“Oh my god, are you alright, Pavel?” Fiona said, her anger quickly dissipated and guilt took its place; her first thought was to blame Pavel for the mess. It could have easily been Emma if her little sister was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Pavel -she noticed now he did look a bit roughed up- met her gaze and gave her half a smile “Yes, I’m fine.”

“He’s not.” Immediately came Geoff’s retort.

Fiona looked concerned as she pulled out her mobile “I’m going to call the police. Did he hurt anyone else?”

“Will he go to jail?” Philip spoke up, wide eyed and terrified at the prospect of his father getting locked up. Geoff would have preferred to hunt down the arsehole and kill him with his bare hands but if he couldn’t then, well.

“We’ll still call the police, Pip.” the knowledge that it was Philip’s father made no difference and he told himself that as the frightened puppy eyes turned to him. “I want him banned from the restaurant at the fucking _least_. Get him done for assault.”

Pavel rolled his eyes. “Geoff, honestly-”

“You hit your head.” Geoff stresses. _How serious does that need to sound? He fucking hit his fucking head! That was the whole reason for…_

__

“Yes, but I’m not going to die.” Pavel retorted lightly but it hit Geoff like a punch to the stomach and he curled his hand into Pavel’s shirt to steady himself. _Breathe._

____

Unaware of Geoff pushing down an impending panic attack Fiona started to walk off “Okay, I’ll make the calls. But this mess needs to be cleared up as soon as possible…Geoff?”

____

It only took a second of hesitation in which Selena offered her help. “I can do it.” When several incredulous eyes turn towards her she shrugged. “Accidents like these used to happen all the time in London.”

____

“Yeah, sorry to spoil your garden of generosity but those heels weren’t exactly made for cleaning, Selena.” Geoff nodded at her velvety high heels. True, she wasn’t exactly dressed for bending or otherwise, but doing it might make her feel better for the horrible way she treated Pavel.

____

“Actually, I think there are some spare shoes in the locker room. They might be your size, Selena.” Pavel could see right through her. Just by the small smile he was giving her now Selena could tell he knew why she had offered to help so eagerly.

____

“Thanks, Pavel.” Selena smiled, for both reasons, and walked out of the dining room.

____

Seeing Pavel rub the back of his head again Geoff put a hand on the small of his back “Pavel, come and sit down.” Surprisingly, Pavel allowed himself to be manoeuvred to a nearby table where he sat down without complaint. It was only when Geoff started talking about doctors he stopped rubbing his head and put an assuring hand on Geoff’s shoulder, quietening his worried boyfriend.

____

“Geoff, all they will say is to keep an eye on me and…you can do that, can’t you?”

____

_Can’t he?_

____

In his mind’s eye Geoff sees the haunting empty hazel eyes, he hears the impact of Pavel’s head hard against the table’s edge, hears his broken grieving when he held Pavel’s dead body in his arms and suddenly it’s gone and he swallows thickly.

____

“Of course I will.” The words were heavy with conviction. Taking Pavel’s hand in his he squeezed it, revelling in the warmth and comfort of such a simple gesture. “But I’m still calling the doctor.”

____

Pavel snorts but nods in his laughter. “Okay! Fine.”

____

Geoff smiles, but he had to make sure. “Alright?”

____

And Pavel nods again, squeezing his hand back. “Right.”

____

Geoff rubs his thumb over Pavel’s knobbly knuckles, the adrenaline high was crashing and he could feel the sharp stings of pain around his knees now. He hears an awkward shuffling behind him and he peeks over his shoulder to see Emma and Philip looking over at them.

____

“Are you sure you’re okay Pavel?” Philip asks, hands twisting in front of him. He had heard the glass breaking and the shouting, not knowing what it was until now and he felt sick. He was sure Geoff hated his guts now and that worried him; he had nowhere else to go.

____

“I’m alright, thanks.” Pavel reassured them with a convincing smile and Geoff had to bite his tongue to rectify that. When Philip and Emma walked off Pavel caught Geoff’s eye and he could see all the things running through Geoff’s head. “Okay! You can call the doctor now.”

____

#

____

____


	5. Then Stops

#

1:05 PM

Emma and Philip sat on a counter, hunched over reading Philip’s worn out recipe note book when the door swung open and their boss walked in. Though his demeanour wasn’t really the Head Chef anymore; it was just Geoff. A man who had a lot of things on his mind, work being the very last of them. But to the younger ones Geoff was still Chef and their heads whipped up from the little book, caught like they’ve been on an unassigned break. 

“How’s Pavel?” Philip was hesitant in his question, thinking Geoff would shout at them to get off their arses and do some work. 

Luckily, Geoff didn’t shout at them. He turned in their direction, scratching absently at his thin top which he wore a moss green cardigan over, and with heavy feet he trudged towards them. 

“He should be fine, I’m taking him to the hospital just in case anyway.” He had called the good doctor over and his check up on Pavel just wasn’t _good enough_. 

A minor concussion. 

It just didn’t make sense. 

Despite how inadequate the good doctor was at his job he still said it was probably a good idea to go to the hospital. Geoff knew Pavel was disgruntled at the suggestion but good doctor or no good doctor, he was still taking Pavel to the hospital for a thorough full body-muscle-bone scan and they were going to get a more in-depth diagnosis than a simple _‘minor concussion’_.

“Not too shabby yourself,” he nodded at Philip and the boy took the compliment with a hanging head, something obviously weighing on his mind. “Took some guts, standing up to your old man like that.” 

_It felt good too_ Philip thought. He had never done that to his dad before, never _said_ those things that so boldly disobeyed him. Whatever bravery he felt in that moment standing up to his father’s temper, however, had fizzled out when he realised Pavel had been attacked and seen the police car pull up at the restaurant door. It fizzled out and left him feeling cold, still angry, but empty. Philip licked his lips nervously, deciding to just go for it. 

“Geoff, I’m sorry for missing the try-out.” The words, easy as they may seem, were daunting. Made worse with the pointed stare from Geoff. “And I’m sorry for messin’ you around like that.” He wanted to look away, feeling the old shame come back at the opportunity Geoff spent so much time and effort making him get, only to get a call saying he never showed up. He wanted to look away from Geoff to escape what lay judging there. He almost did too. His head bowed, eyes trailing down to glance the floor until he took a breath and straightened up again, looking his boss in the eye.

“Would you take me back?”

_Please take me back, please Geoff, please_ -

For a second Geoff just looked at him. Philip winced, because that was the same look Geoff gave to people who had disappointed him. Plus, the drama with his dad -his lousy father- smashing up the place and attacking Pavel along with it. He caused so much stress to the already, naturally stressed Head Chef it was a wonder Geoff didn’t come at him knives and all, kicking him back to the homeless shelter. 

But now he really had nowhere else to go.

If Geoff was going to say anything at that moment, he was interrupted by Emma’s supportive _‘please let Philip stay’_ speech.

“Chef, I really think he’s got-”

“Ah!” Geoff gave Emma a sharp look and, like a trained pup, she fell silent. She squeezed his hand as their boss - her boss? His ex-boss? – turned to him. He was confused to see Geoff fighting a smile. 

“Can you tell your lawyer here to pipe down, please?” 

_Is cracking jokes a good or a bad sign?_ He didn’t know, Geoff was a wise cracker at the worst of times and- 

But he was smiling at Emma as she huffed and rolled her eyes. _Smiling after jokes is good, right?_ This was so confusing. Luckily, Geoff took pity on him.

“Yes Philip, I will take you back.” He looked pleasantly exasperated, like their worries were a tad overdramatic. Philip could breathe again, and maybe smile, if he got over his numbing relief. “Despite what you all may think, I’m not in the habit of firing good cooks for one mistake.” He rose a brow here, don’t make it two went unsaid. “I will however _definitely_ dock you from one day’s pay.” 

That was good enough for him. 

He laughed, feeling Emma squeeze his hand again. “Thank you.”

Geoff gave him a rare smile, before his gaze flitted down to the little book in Philip’s lap.

“What’s going on here?” He reached out and took it, daring the boy to protest- he didn’t. He only blushed, preparing for the haranguing he was about to get. His scribblings of recipe ideas. “Beer cooked beef, layered with onions with a butter and hot milk mash?” He read out, looking off to the side in thought. Philip felt his heart beating heavy in his chest.

“It wouldn’t work?”

Geoff quirked an eyebrow at that “Well there’s only one way to find out.” He turned around, as if inspired by a thought. “Emma, why don’t you, ah, get your text on, see if you can organise a staff meal.” He didn’t get an immediate reply, as the two were staring wide-eyed at him and each other as if they were in a shocked stupor. Philip was just processing the thought that Geoff _wanted_ him to show off his ideas, that his ideas were _worth_ showing off.

Their pleasant surprise must have been on for a bit too long because Geoff paused to eye them critically. 

“You guys got something better to do or…?”

The shock melted into a splutter of words and shaking heads “N-no chef!”

“Well get cranking!” Geoff watched the two jump down from the counter and felt a warm feeling rising from the spark of annoyance in his chest. “Come on!” God help him if he ended up feeling fond of these two. 

#

1:30pm

In no time at all the staff meal preparation was in full swing. Geoff could still recall everything from there, the easy camaraderie and jokes being thrown around the kitchen as Philip took control of the meal prep in that bumbling way of his even as Geoff shadowed him and critiqued his every decision. 

But Geoff wasn’t there this time around. He could still hear the loud clanging of pots and pans from the dining room, with the odd cheer from new staff entering the kitchen to help with the meal tonight.

“And just tilt your head to the side…” 

Geoff tuned back into the conversation around him. Doctor Tosser was examining a disgruntled looking Pavel beside him. Geoff couldn’t understand Pavel’s scowl as he went through the motions. Yes, Geoff may have demanded the doctor to do another check up on Pavel but, frankly he was justified in doing so when he caught the slightest hint of pain via a wince that Pavel tried to conceal by rubbing his head. Just the thought almost made his heart drop to his stomach.

“Tell me when you feel any pain or discomfort beyond the nausea and dizziness.” Doctor Tosser continued, probing lightly at the back of Pavel’s head. Geoff would always hold a chronic dislike for the man; his romantic advances towards Pavel, despite it being a time when he and Pavel had broken up for a while due to his emotionally stunted period of arsehole-ness. Despite all that, he was a doctor and Geoff was desperate. 

“The dizziness is gone now.” Pavel said, eyes flicking towards Geoff with an inpatient quirk of his brow, but then the doctor must have done something because his lips suddenly pursed tightly and his eyes moved down to the table.

“That hurt him.” Geoff spoke up, ignoring the dark look Pavel glanced his way. Doctor Tosser paused in his ministrations and Pavel reached up to gingerly touch the back of his head. 

“Yes, it is to be expected with these kind of injuries, you’ll likely get some swelling at the area of impact and phantom symptoms of nausea or small dizzy spells. I would, however, recommend going to hospital nevertheless.” He spoke mainly to Pavel who nodded curtly at his words and then glanced at Geoff when he finished. He sat back and addressed Geoff who had reached out to take Pavel’s hand in his, the touch grounded him. “It all points to a minor concussion as I said before, but I can write up some notes that you can take to the hospital, just so that they have an idea of your symptoms.” He flipped a few pages on his notepad and started to scribble down something under everything he wrote so far during Pavel’s check-up.

Geoff didn’t believe it was just a minor concussion, but he pushed the bubbling panic aside and squeezed just the bit tighter onto Pavel’s hand. “I don’t want to take any chances.” 

The door to the kitchen swung open “Chef?” 

Geoff exhaled and turned around “What is it?” 

Shane stood at the door, propping it open with his side, a dripping stainless steel pot in his hands. “Someone waiting fer yer out back.” He announced, then slunk back into the kitchen, door swinging shut behind him.

Geoff frowned for a moment. He looked back at Pavel and, aware of the doctor’s sharp gaze on them, leaned in for a swift kiss on Pavel’s forehead. “I’ll be back in a bit.” He let himself get lost in those crinkly hazel eyes for a second before he stood up from the table they were sat at and sauntered towards the kitchen. “Check his eyes one more time, Doctor!”

#

Pushing through the kitchen’s back doors to the outdoor alley way Geoff stopped in momentary surprise.

“Selena.”

She stood in the middle of the alley wrapped up in her coat and sparkly hat. The alley lead to the main street behind her and the noise of traffic it was a constant ambience surrounding them.

Geoff leaned against the brick wall and breathed in the cold air. “Thought you’d gone.” He said, tucking his hands into his pockets. He remembered this part from Before, the taut lines of stress in her face but that softer look in her eyes as she approached him. 

And just like before. She pulled out that familiar brown paper envelope from that patterned satchel of hers and held it out to him.

“It’s just, it’s in euros. Do you have any sterling?” She shifted, biting her lip sheepishly. Geoff kept his face blank as he stared at her, he recognised the bright teasing glint in her eyes and the twitch of her mouth as she tried not to smile. She huffed out a little laugh and glanced away. “It’s a joke, Geoff.” Selena straightened up a bit and thrust the hefty envelope towards him again. “I don’t need it. What I need to do is to face up to what happened in London, on my own. Without your help.”

There his friend was. From the unrecognisable terror she was before, merely hours ago, this change of behaviour reminded Geoff of the woman he had called a best friend some time ago. With a hidden smile, he took the envelope of the four-thousand euros he and Pavel withdrew earlier that day and stuffed it into the pocket of his cardigan.

“You’re gonna have to pay them back though.” He added, watching the way Selena chewed her lip as she nodded. 

“I will, somehow.” She winced, no doubt thinking about all the labour she would have to do to make it up. “And can you thank Pavel for me too?” She moved a strand of hair away from her face as the wind picked up around them.

Geoff smiled at her, nodding in reassurance. Pavel would have kittens over this miraculous one-eighty Selena pulled on them by acting like a responsible adult. Selena watched him with sharp eyes, and she smiled brilliantly at something she saw in his face. 

“You’re going to Prague, aren’t you?” She grinned. Geoff opened his mouth to demand how she knew but Selena continued, “I can see it in your face, you’ve already decided.”

Geoff just shrugged with a smile of his own. Prague would be their next adventure, and he would do anything to make that future possible. It _would_ happen. 

“I’m gonna start divorce proceedings.” Selena said, and Geoff felt a rush of relief surge through him, leaving him lighter. “Sorry to spring it on you Geoff but I just don’t think we’re well matched.” She joked, albeit weakly, and they both shared a smirk. _Go be with your man_ , went unsaid. _I’m sorry_.

She held her arms out and Geoff rolled his eyes before stepping into her hug. She squeezed him around the shoulders and quietly murmured. “I’m glad you’re happy.”

“I am.” Geoff squeezed her back and they separated with a soft smile. 

“Bye.” Selena smiled and turned away. She walked out of the alley towards the street and disappeared down the corner. 

A double decker bus passed by, the yellow and blue colours bright against the grey sky. 

#

4:00pm 

The hardest part of losing someone, especially someone you love, wasn’t just the hole of what once was their life. For Geoff, it was knowing that you could have prevented it. Could’ve been in the right place at the right time to save them. 

One inch.

The angle at which Pavel hit the table when he was pushed was one inch away from being fatal, they said. After the demanded MRI and a painful hour waiting game the neurologist told them that if Pavel had fallen one inch to the right he would have ruptured a vessel in his brain, causing cerebral haemorrhaging and internal bleeding which would have killed him in a short few hours. Instead, he was bruised blue, but the swelling was only minimal and they had given him medication for the pain, saying to have plenty of rest and to avoid strenuous activity.

Doctor Tosser could fuck off with his fucking _minor concussion_. If Pavel had been only one fucking inch to the bloody fucking _right_. Geoff inhaled shakily, feeling lightheaded suddenly. He didn’t understand how…everything happened like the first time, he didn’t _save_ him, wasn’t there to catch him in time, so what-

“I was turning,” Pavel said softly. He was sitting beside Geoff in the empty consultation room the neurologist had left them in for privacy. He had pressed his face against Geoff’s neck, arms wrapped around his waist and clutched tightly to his green threaded cardigan. Geoff had folded himself around Pavel in turn, burying his nose in Pavel’s soft blond hair. It was a morbidly similar position to that night on the kitchen floor, but this time Geoff felt the warm puffs of air against his neck and the tight clutch of those arms around him. 

“I heard you yell, and I was turning around, because you yelled my name.” Pavel’s voice was quiet, shaken. He turned his head to bury his face further into his boyfriend’s neck. “If you didn’t, and I didn’t turn…Geoff-” He cut off, and Geoff shook his head, feeling hot tears run down his face to dampen the hair he was hiding in. 

“God Pavel-” Geoff’s voice cracked. He took a deep breath, willing the tremors down so he could fucking _concentrate_. He squeezed his eyes shut against the memories that threatened to overwhelm him. _He’s here, he’s alive. He’s right fucking here_.

“I’m here,” Pavel breathed “I’m not going anywhere.”

He really wasn’t. 

“Was that what your dream was about?” Pavel continued, his voice a soft murmur over the gentle vibration. Geoff felt a wave of grief rise as he remembered Before, but Pavel held him tighter, pressing a kiss to his neck that sent a warm flush through Geoff. “You dreamt of this, somehow, yeah? But you saw me, you saw me die instead. I died from it.” The words were slow and soothing, caressing the pain still harboured in Geoff.

“I couldn’t save you, I just, Fiona found you and she called me.” Geoff’s breath hitched “And then you said you were fine, but I found you sat on those fucking steps in the kitchen and you were just gone, the-the injury took you so quickly. The bleeding-” He felt a sob lodge in his throat and stopped speaking altogether to just breathe through it. Pavel pulled back and held Geoff’s face in his hands. He stroked his thumb over the tear marks on his cheeks and lifted sad hazel eyes to wet ocean green ones.

“Look at me, Geoff” he whispered, waiting until Geoff focused his eyes on him. “You saved me-”

“Don’t Pavel-”

“Shut the fuck up Geoff.” Shocked eyes snapped to him and Pavel smirked, gentle hands still stroking Geoff’s face. “You saved my life, I wouldn’t have turned if you didn’t yell at me.” He leant in to brush his lips against Geoff’s, nudging their noses together. “Love you so much.”

Geoff closed his eyes as a sob passed his lips. Pavel hushed him, pressing another soft kiss to his trembling lips.

“We’re okay. We’re both here, alive, and I love you so much.” He whispered, the words like a prayer, spoken with a promise into Geoff’s lips. 

And Geoff breathed them in, because it was the only thing he could do. 

“But, Geoff…” Pavel sounded hesitant, and Geoff’s eyes flew open in concern. Pavel chewed his lip for a second before he smiled sheepishly. “I’m sorry but, I’m really, really hungry.”

#

5:00pm

“Pass the virgin stew for Pavel, will you?” Geoff hollered down the table, much to the embarrassment of his boyfriend beside him. Pavel was still mortified that Geoff had called the staff beforehand to make a smaller stew for Pavel. but minus the alcohol of course as he was taking the prescribed pain medication. And yet, despite it all, Pavel felt that surge of warmth that forced a soft smile to the surface. 

Kate stopped at his side of the table, cheekily holding out two wine glasses. “Now, Pavel, are you red or white?” 

Geoff watched a myriad of expressions flit across Pavel’s face- incredulity, confusion- until he laughed, nudging him with a shoulder. “It’s grape juice, completely harmless.” He bit down on a cackle as Pavel took the red glass, scowling at a laughing Kate. 

“You are all terrible comedians.”

Across the table, Geoff caught the eye of his business partner. Fiona was the first person, aside from Selena, that they had told of their move to Prague to. It seemed so long ago when they teamed up together to start up RAW again, and now the business was doing really well, Geoff couldn’t be prouder of them.

“You know when you told me you couldn’t cope if I left RAW? That isn’t true. Well it might have been true when you said it, but we got a whole new team with fresh ideas and real talent.” Geoff had said, perched on the edge of his desk with Pavel sitting on the other side. Fiona had stood there, that one manicured eyebrow perched high ever since they mentioned ‘Prague’. She shook her head, a fond but exasperated smile tugging at her lips as she sighed, the two were already firm in their decision. She was happy for them. 

“I can’t replace you, Geoff.”

Pavel sniffed, a bit miffed. “And what about me?”

“I definitely can’t replace you, Pavel. Who else would I find who knows the restaurant inside and out? You’re not leaving so soon are you?”

Geoff had cocked a grin at her. “Call this a six-month notice.” 

She tutted with a roll of her eyes. “Come here you two.” She threw her arms out and squeezed the life out of them. In the privacy of his own thoughts, Geoff admitted that Fiona would be one he would miss. 

Now, looking around the table, Geoff knew that they would do well, with or without him.

“Hey, hey! Mind the wine would yer?”

Another little surprise for the team had been Jojo. She had turned up at the end of the day looking a picture of miserable. She had wanted to talk, and Geoff, being the type of person he is, made her say her piece in the middle of the kitchen with Fiona, Pavel and Phillip present. She did, and Geoff saw that fighting spirit flare, the trait that had gotten her the job in the first place. Even when she had laid her emotions bare in front of them, _not to beg_ , she had said, _or make excuses_. And fair enough, Geoff thought, she had been a right terror the past week or so, especially to Phillip. But she was hard-strong and a bloody brilliant cook, and Geoff hated firing good cooks and then regretting it.

Which was why it gave Geoff a great pleasure to see the look on her face when he told her he wanted her to apply for his position at RAW. His back ached at the memory; Jojo gives the hardest fucking hugs.

“Bloody hell, watch yer doing Shane! Almost ruined Pip’s brilliant dinner ‘ere.” Jojo leaned over to playfully ruffle Phillip’s hair who flushed red at the praise. He’d been gradually getting rosier with everyone’s praise of his food. Geoff wouldn’t ever say it in front of everyone here, but he had a quiet talk with the boy after tasting the meal earlier on. 

“Really terrific mate, very proud of you. I would almost pay for this.” Geoff had said, trying not to smile as Phillip snorted out a laugh. He didn’t look offended or meek, which meant Geoff’s humour wasn’t as effective as it used to be. Fucking shame.

“You may have to someday.” Philip smiled, and that boy really did have some cheek. Standing up to his bastard of a dad really gave the kid some more character. Completely against his will with absolutely no amusement involved, Geoff felt the corners of his lips rise and with a shake of his own head he let the grin break through. 

_“Oh I hope so.”_

Pavel had been helpful as ever to offer his old flat to Philip. It was cheap and he could move in right away he had said, mostly because he and Geoff had moved in together a while back. Looking over at Pavel now, who was leaning over to talk with Donny, Geoff took it all in. He took in the line of his back as he leaned forward, the wash of dark blond hair falling into his face as he nodded, then the crinkle at his eyes as he laughed, the delight brightening his entire face. It’s not even surprising, or too soon to think, but Geoff knows he’s going to marry that man one day. 

He watches Pavel fiddle with the cutlery in front of him and Geoff imagines a certain circular piece of jewellery glinting off the light, snug against Pavel’s third finger. It’s not a bad fantasy.

The warm smell of freshly baked bread passes his nose and he notices Kate walk back into the dining room with the newly cut platter. He sees Pavel perk up at that, breaking the little conversation bubble he and Donny were in. Geoff watches him take in the table, the hanging lights, until his gaze turns to him and, fuck but Geoff knows he’s got some sappy soft look on his face that would kill his reputation but, honestly, he doesn’t give a shit. Geoff would do anything for this man, even change their new restaurant to be completely vegan if he’d asked. Albeit grudgingly though, he’s not a complete pushover. 

He watches Pavel lazily rake his eyes over him and when they reach back up to his face he winks. It’s only Fiona that interrupts their moment with a call of his name.

“Geoff?” It’s teasing, he can tell, the word drawn out and lilting. 

Geoff leans back in his chair, meeting her eyes. “Yes?” he drawls with a grin. 

“Are you that happy to be leaving us?” Fiona says, smiling. That wine glass may have been one past her limit. Granted it was only six months until they left, and he was genuinely looking forward to this new venture. But jokes be. 

He grins back “Not at all, not at all.” 

Fiona laughs him off, and Geoff can feel Pavel’s gaze on him. When he looks, there’s a little coy smirk playing at his lips. They share a heated look before Pavel glances away, leaving Geoff staring after him.

_“Do you remember when we first met?” Geoff asked, leaning against the metal table, the only other person in the kitchen being Pavel in all his ruffled glory. He looked bemused at the question for a second before it melted into a warm smile._

_“How could I forget? I was bringing out a bag of rubbish,” He recalled, and Geoff listened with a grin. “You followed me,” Pavel said, accusing eyes shooting at Geoff who snorted, he remembered that well, “told me to clean out the skip first.” Geoff laughed aloud at that, Pavel eyed him, but he was grinning as well. “And! You called me Paulo.” The sharp indignation made Geoff bark out a laugh._

_“But you were Paulo.”_

_“Yes,” Pavel narrowed his eyes on him in mock offence “you could never get it in your head, **I wasn’t Polish**.”_

_Geoff just smiled, studying his man. He didn’t mean to say it aloud, but the words breathed from his lips all the same. “How did I end up with you?”_

_Pavel snorted “Kdo říká, že skončíš se mnou?”_

_Geoff gazed at him, until he realised the words didn’t make sense in his head. “What?” He slowly grinned, recognising that familiar Czech Pavel would unknowingly slip into._

_“What?” Pavel looked confused himself._

_“What did you say?”_

_Pavel blinked, and then laughed at himself, shaking his head with a grin Geoff wanted to kiss so badly. “Oh! Sorry. I said, who says you’re going to end up with me?”_

_Geoff shrugged “Well, I am about to be a free man, when the divorce comes through.” I want to call you my husband, Geoff thought, watching as Pavel frowned with that mock pout._

_“Don’t be sad.” He reached out to give Geoff a consolidatory pat on the shoulder. “Plenty more fish in the sea.” He quipped playfully, pulling back. Geoff followed him, the next words seemed quiet over the loud beating of his heart._

_“Pavel…do you want to get married?”_

_It wasn’t the most romantic of proposals, which was probably why Pavel snorted in amusement._

_“You’re joking.” he said with a roll of his eyes. Geoff just shook his head, watching with rising excitement as Pavel slowly realised he was being serious with this._

_“You’re not joking?”_

_“No,” it really was the most unromantic proposal of all proposals but Geoff couldn’t give a damn about that now, he wanted to wake up with this man for the rest of his life. “What do you say? Do you want to get hitched?”_

_Be mine. I love you._

_Pavel could probably see it, the unnatural stillness to his face, the minute fidgeting of his fingers, that twitch of his mouth as he stopped himself from biting his lip. Geoff knew the second it registered for him, because his whole face lit up in amazement and he promptly launched himself at Geoff, knocking the breath out of him._

_“Yes, of course!” Pavel rushed out, and Geoff could cry if he wasn’t being smothered by his favourite fucking person in the world._

_Forgive me my rubbish proposal, he wanted to say. But that didn’t matter right now. His shit proposal was accepted. Pavel said yes._

_“I love you, Geoff.” He felt Pavel murmur against his neck he pressed himself into. Geoff felt a ridiculous smile coming through and he pulled back a bit so Pavel could see it, but also so he could look into those hazel eyes and wonder again at how he got so lucky._

_“And I love you…Paulo.” He grinned at his fiancé- shit, he can say that now- and shut up any upcoming complaints by raising a hand up to his jaw to guide him forward so he could plant a sweet kiss on his lips. It didn’t get any deeper than surface level, mostly because Geoff knew anything more and he would be spreading his legs for Pavel to slot himself in-between right here in this kitchen. When they had time. Not now when the staff were waiting on Geoff to bring out Phillip’s stew so they could all start eating. Pavel was going to flip when he tried it though, he has a thing for alcohol-heavy meals. Geoff had shadowed little Phillip like a bloody reaper during most of the prep and cooking, keeping his criticism inside of course, and he could safely say the meal was going to be one of Phillip’s best._

_“Uh, hello?” Geoff broke away from the warmth of his fiancé’s mouth and turned towards the kitchen door. Jojo stood there, hands thrown out in exasperation._

_“Uh one second! One second.” Geoff held up a finger, flashing her a rueful smile, and Jojo stalked off into the dining room. Geoff let his hands slide down Pavel’s neck to fidget at the collar of his shirt. “Should we-do you want to tell them?” He can’t believe he would be considering going out to them, announcing their engagement. He feels a giddy pleasure at it, no matter how wild and terrifying it all felt as well. He wants this._

_Pavel catches his fingers quickly “Wait, wait! I want to get that bottle I brought you back. We can open it, when we tell them.” Geoff thinks his love for boxsets could be a good contender for Pavel’s equal love for Czech alcohol. He looks at those bright eyes and wants so badly to kiss him again, but they made the team wait long enough already._

_“Okay, it’s in the office.”_

_He pulls away then, watching Pavel walk off. There’s an ache deep in his chest as he does, and he’s not quite sure what that means, but he shrugs it off and lets the bliss of the moment bring him a contented joy he hadn’t felt for a while. The smile on his face is something he wouldn’t even let Fiona see- and she’d seen him cry._

_He picks up the pot of stew from the hob and carries it into the dining room._

 

_“Hurry up Pavel, it’s getting cold!”_

 

Fin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for sticking with this wild fucking journey. It's been a pleasure. Comment if you want or hit the kudos and co. I'll appreciate it all the same. 
> 
> Love, La x


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